Please go see your doctor or talk to someone. If you can't explain how you feel, write it down.Quote:
Originally Posted by freckleface
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Please go see your doctor or talk to someone. If you can't explain how you feel, write it down.Quote:
Originally Posted by freckleface
Quote:
Originally Posted by AbigailPlease go see your doctor or talk to someone. If you can't explain how you feel, write it down.Quote:
Originally Posted by freckleface
I cant.
Theyll try and lock me up somewhere.
My mum thinks I'm doing it for attention. She doesnt understand.
She sees me as a failure for a daughter.
and she's right.
People are only sectioned in extreme cases where they present a considerable danger to themselves or others. It's not a decision made by just one person, at least two doctors have to agree that its in your best interests.
You don't need your parents consent to speak to a doctor alone and the doctor can only tell them if he thinks you don't understand the treatment he's offering or you pose a serious risk to yourself.
Why do you think you're a failure?
i know i am.
all my friends are more pretty, better, cleverer than me.
im selfish and never think about anyone else.
i dont want to speak to my daughter because my mums friend works there and she would see me there.
I am sure you are just as pretty as any other girls, you are very clever with signatures on here, I can't even do them myself, so you are better and cleverer than me in this respect. We can't all be good at the same things, that is how we can learn from each other :) Why are you concerned about your mum's friend that you don't want to speak to your daughter?
lol.
im feeling a bit better but really stuffed up with a cold
:(
suppose that dont help me.
I went to the doctors this morning. I scored highly on the questionnaire so he prescribed me citalopram. Go back in two weeks but it could take up to six weeks to feel any benefit.
The doctor was great, not like the others that I've seen at the practice, so I'll just see him from now on.
Good luck with citalopram, I'm on it and it's helped a lot. There *may* be side effects but don't worry- they do go away.Quote:
Originally Posted by Abigail
I'd also advise you keep seeing the same doctor, as they'll get to know you better and know how you act and stuff; mine knows me so well that she knows if I say something like "I'm okay" then she should be worried....
Keep seeing him regularly too, it's really important in case you have a bad reaction (but you already probably knew!).
Good luck, and if you have any citalopram related questions just ask (or pm me :))
Thank you :) I actually feel worse now that I have a diagnosis and medication than I did this morning.Quote:
Originally Posted by ToriGood luck with citalopram, I'm on it and it's helped a lot. There *may* be side effects but don't worry- they do go away.Quote:
Originally Posted by Abigail
I'd also advise you keep seeing the same doctor, as they'll get to know you better and know how you act and stuff; mine knows me so well that she knows if I say something like "I'm okay" then she should be worried....
Keep seeing him regularly too, it's really important in case you have a bad reaction (but you already probably knew!).
Good luck, and if you have any citalopram related questions just ask (or pm me :))
What's the best way to take it? I haven't had anything to eat this morning and I'm feeling really light headed and dizzy (took 10mg an hour ago, increase to 20mg next week). Is it better at bed time to help sleep or in the morning?
I'm struggling with what to tell my tutor. I'm supposed to be in a lab session but I just can't face talking to people. "I don't want to talk to people" isn't a good excuse. I'm actually finding it a huge problem to move from my current position on the chair so I've got no hope of going to my afternoon lecture.
Sorry for the long rant. I haven't experienced apathy towards education on this level before. Procrastination yes but distinct and severe lack of motivation is alien.
I will try to see the same doctor but he only works on a Tuesday morning. My doctors is an outreach student service so they only have one doctor on per surgery and each doctor only does one surgery per week. The main practice is about five miles away.
Unfortunately that can happen- putting a name to it makes it worse!
I've always been advised to take it in the morning, to take it at a similarish kind of time and I would probably take it with food; I always eat in the morning anyway, so I've not had much experience of taking it without food buuuut on occasion if I'm hungry then it isn't a pleasant experience! I would be surprised if they were giving you side effects already, but then again I had something like that and people told me that it couldn't be true!
Tell your tutor that you're struggling a bit at the moment, and have been diagnosed with depression, you don't have to tell them any more than that, but that's basically what I told mine and they were okay about it. If you don't mind me asking, how long has it been going on for?
Don't worry about ranting; I don't mind :)
Wow, that doctors system sounds really complicated. Not entirely sure I understand it, but hopefully you'll be able to see him again!
It's been going on for about six years, on and off. This is the first time I've been to the doctor about it, although I did speak to my gp from home on the phone last year who said it was stress. When I'm stressed I usually shout and throw things. This is a quiet and lingering feeling.
I've just reached the point where I've had enough of feeling like this, not being able to sleep, being in pain etc. I didn't even say much to the doctor, I said I was feeling sad and he said he could see it in my eyes.
Given my score on the PHQ 9 form, I should be having counselling as well but I refused it. I find it oppressive and the doctor agreed about the student counselling service. He said he can refer me elsewhere for other things if need be but I'll keep it as a very last resort.
When I finally get my room tidied (took me an hour to make the bed), I will have something to eat.
Ah, good old doctors and stress.
My doctor did everything the other way around: referrals galore and then I moved to uni and they were shocked that I hadn't been on medication. I really hope that they work for you. My uni medical centre had a specialist mental health worker, as well as the counselling service, but I guess that because yours is so far away that may not be offered.
There are other things available apart from counselling, but I guess in a way similar, for example psychological therapies, cbt, etc but I guess it comes down to personal preference. I hate my uni counselling service, but I found somewhere else, which was nicer... as well as being bundled around the NHS!
Good luck!
We have a mental wellbeing person who shares her time between the university and the hospital. Apparently she's really good. I had counselling when I was 16 and I hated it. I'm very masculine in that sense, I only ever talk about something if it is a huge problem.
I'm aware of other therapies and hoping this medication works.
I dont mind talking to people, but as long as I dont know them.
I clam up infront of my friends, i suppose because I dont know them and also i feel like theyll judge me.
But online forums and such like this work well because I feel better not having to confront anyone personally.
Have you thought about phoning or emailing the Samaritans? They're open 24hrs a day and it's all confidential.Quote:
Originally Posted by freckleface
They have 202 branches that you can go in to as well. I didn't realise that there's a branch down my street until I looked on the website.
I talked once to my old english teacher.
she was really nice and used to volunteer at samaritans.
but she left 2 years ago and i havent had the courage to speak to any one.
I cant even talk to my mum because she is threatening to make me go to the doctor because i'm not eating.
this would just be another excuse for her to take me to the doctors and them force me to eat.
*sigh*
Your mum is worried about your health, and she has reason.Quote:
Originally Posted by freckleface
I can't make you go to the doctor, but if I was your mum I would want to, too. But, I would want you to want help, too. It is important to see your mum as someone who loves and cares about you - she probably doesn't have a clue about what you are going through but really wants to help you and feels helpless herself.
You need to speak with someone you trust to try to help you feel better about yourself. Perhaps you could find another doctor and go without your mum?
I will tell you something that very few people know. I was bulimic from the ages of probably 17 - 22, it probably started when I was going through school exams, and continued the whole time I was at university and through my first job.
I was very slim and tall, and very concerned about my appearance - I never left the house without full make-up and I used to dress up to the nines when I went out with my friends. Most of my friends were quite a bit shorter than me, and I felt that I should be the same weight and same size as them - which is ridiculous really - I was nine inches taller than one of them.
I hid it totally from my mother, and to this day (I am 45) I have no idea if she knew or not.
I used to stuff my face and then make myself sick, that or I would be on the cambridge diet when I was already well below the ideal weight for my height.
When I see photos of myself from that time I hardly recognise myself, I was very glamorous and fake - I looked good and felt awful. I was always being stopped in Glasgow and London and asked if I wanted to be a model, I didn't but I felt that I looked so awful without the props I couldn't go out.
I was very unhappy, very insecure and very needy of reassurance.
When I was 22 I moved away from home, changed jobs and basically changed a lot. I met my husband for some reason I felt able to be myself with him, to doss about in jeans and not wear make up all the time and just get dressed up for a reason. I put on a bit of weight, I stopped making myself sick (partly because I felt ashamed and didn't want him to know) and I felt much happier.
This probably isn't what you want to hear but bulimia is not about being thin, it is about being unhappy and trying to find something about yourself that you can control.
I don't know what it is that you need to talk about, but you need to talk, and you need to find out what what the problem so you can work it out, move forward healthily.
Speak to your mum
xx
(BTW - purging is very, very bad for your teeth. You might not notice till later, but it is).
I'm with Trinity on this, unfortunately probably not what you want to hear but as someone who currently is trying to get out of this rut, it can really mess with you. Getting help, accepting there is a problem can be really difficult... There is a big link between food and mood, so the not eating may be causing you to feel depressed. I think Trinity can put it better than I can in terms of explaining it all, but don't be scared of getting help, every doctor I've seen has been nice :)
Thanks guys, this is making me feel better.
I am really funny about purging as I dont want to ruin my teeth.
Ive never been a purger, and tbh i am glad i dont.
feeling better today as i had skating, i always feel better when i'm on the ice, it makes me feel free. I always feel like no-oen can touch me and i just love the experience.
Only down side is that i fell today badly and ive got a ice burn on my hand and ive bruised my ribs making it hard for me to move.
In quite a bit of pain and am on painkillers to numb it but that isnt helping with my mood.
Got coursework due in on friday and am really stressed about it but im trying to keep calm and not worry.
just taking everything one step at a time.
Also felt better last night, watching children in need, as it ade me realise that there are people out there who are worse off than me.
I saw the doctor again yesterday (feel like I spend my life there at the moment) and she sent me for a thyroid function blood test. I've had loads of TFTs before but not linked to depression. The last TFT I had was in April (I have a full screen for everything about once a year) and it was normal.
I found out a few days ago that one of my friend's is a psychiatrist (how I didn't know before I don't quite understand) so I'm asking him what the link is.
Really not liking taking the citalopram, it's making me feel awful. Can't change for another two weeks as it can take at least six weeks to start working.
EDIT: Just spoken to my psych friend and he says that thyroid and depression can either be linked, entirely separate or thyroid malfunction can be a result from lithium treatment for depression. They can exist at the same time but not have a cause/effect on each other. Thyroid testing is routine.
Thyroid tests can be linked to depression as a thyroid malfunction can cause tiredness, thus some of the signs of depression.
I hope it either starts to work or you can change to something better soon! I know what you mean about spending your life at the doctors- sometimes last year I was there 3 times a week- I wanted a season ticket!
I was really upset when I went yesterday. Things haven't been good this week and I've been having some really dark thoughts. I spoke to a friend on Wednesday night and he was really concerned so I said I'd see the doctor on Thursday.
The way my doctors at uni works is one doctor does one surgery (morning or afternoon) per week so you never see the same doctor twice unless you go in a specific surgery. I haven't seen the doctor who diagnosed me since as he is on holiday so Friday I saw a really nice doctor and yesterday I saw a woman.
I don't think she understood just how unhappy I was/am. I said I wanted to change medication as it isn't doing anything and I thought the suicidal thoughts were a side effect (it does say several times in the leaflet about suicidal thoughts in under 25s). She said as long as I don't act on them, go see a counsellor and stay on the medication until my next review in two weeks. Not at all helpful or reassuring. I was given the option of changing meds on Friday so I don't see why I couldn't change yesterday.
I had two days where I couldn't see the wood for the trees, so to speak. I sent some pretty nasty emails to a friend and I honestly don't know why.
Abigail I really hope you feel better soon, you deserve to be happy :) bad things shouldn't happen to good people it's just wrong.
I'm confused, I've actually been on a massive high the past week or 2, and suddenly everything seems to have hit rock bottom again this week. All my feelings of "whats the point" and feeling bad for even waking up, and the thoughts of bad things have returned, I can't sleep properly, and I just feel like I've lost control over everything. I just don't know what to do anymore. It's weird that I know deep down my family adore me and would do anything for me, and my friends are always there too... but I feel so isolated and lonely. I don't want to be around anyone, just rather be in my room on my own.
Kirsty, have you been back to see the doctor?
Has anything happened in the past few days that has made you crash?
No, I didn't think I should because I've been fine for a week or so.
Well I guess so, there's more confusion over where I used to work and my hopes of them re-opening have kind of been crushed, I've also taken my car off the road because I can't afford to run it at the moment.. everythings slipping away
If you continue to feel like this, you should go back and see someone. I put it off for years and really regret not getting help earlier. Most doctors are sympathetic and will listen to how you're feeling and what you want to happen. There's many different types of therapy and medication and you don't have to have either or both if you don't want. The course of treatment is entirely up to you.
I'll see how I feel next week, I just don't want to tell my family. I feel like a complete let down as it is, by explaining how I really feel will make me feel worse, I've always been known by anyone thats ever come across me as "happy, bubbly smiley Kirsty". I think my Nan has cottoned on to the fact that I'm not very happy, everyday she asks if I'm okay, and that I don't seem very happy, if she asks again, I will just let her know that I'm not feeling the best, I hope she understands that. I remember a few years ago though, I wans't myself, but my Nan knew and got really worried as my Grandads niece had manic depression and took her own life... my Nan was prepared to keep me house bound so she could keep her eye on me and that's the last thing I want is to be kept an eye on.
I completely understand that you don't want to be wrapped up in cotton wool. At the end of the day, your family love and care about you and they won't want to see you struggle. If your nan is asking if you're ok, she's obviously picked up that something's not right. Talk to her about how you're feeling, she'll want to help in whatever way she can. From what you've said before about her, your nan sounds like an amazing person.
Depression and low mood are caused by an imbalance of chemicals in the brain, it's nobody's fault that you feel like this. Depression and manic depression are two very different illnesses.
I've just sent my mum an email to tell her that I'm on anti depressants. I didn't want my family to know but as I've gradually told close friends, I now feel able to tell my mum. I honestly don't know how she's going to react but I know that she loves me and is going to drive me up the wall when I go home by constantly asking how I am. The support of my family is what I need at the moment, especially as I will be away from my friends for about a month. And it might just save me from killing my mother over Christmas :p
I have suffered with depression for the last 5 years.
I have had been on anti depressants on and off and it all started for me when I went to enter uni some years back. I just couldn't handle the stress and missing my family that I just crumpled :(
Since then I have managed to cope with distance learning and holding down a job but I find it hard to be in the company of others at times or find people that I can just be me with. Everyone can at times expect so much out of me and want me to be the life and soul of the party at all times and I can put on a front when needed :(
Depression is nothing to be laughed at and there is no magic cure but for me exercise works keeps my mind busy and stops me having low dark periods.
I sm one of the lucky ones. I haven't suffered from depression but I have withnessed it in my family. My sister had six nervous breakdowns in five years down to having her kids taken into care because they had been sexually abused. This happened 2o years ago and the scars are still raw. But those kids have turned into wonderful and beautiful adults.
I don't pretend to know what many of you are going through but I plead with you to talk to someone and get support. I understand that it is difficult to speak to family members on how you are feeling. But please don't bottle it up. There are many friends on here who will give a shoulder to cry on if you don't want to talk to strangers but please don't suffer in silence.
My mum didn't say much, just that citalopram can take six weeks to work. Well she'd know as she takes it herself. I'm quite pleased that she didn't tell me to go home or tell me what I should be asking the doctor.
My close friends know all the bad stuff, they bear the brunt of it when I'm in a dark mood and they're amazing. My family know the bare minimum and boring stuff like medication. I find it easier that way as I don't trust my family not to talk about stuff to other people.
There's so much support available. You can self-refer to your school, college or university counsellor. It's free and the waiting lists are much shorter than the NHS counsellors. You don't have to see a doctor and it's confidential.
If you go through your GP and you're 18 or under, you might be referred to CAMHS (child and adolescent mental health services). I saw a psychologist through CAMHS and they're brilliant people. Waiting lists are very long though.
Don't let things get to the point where you can't cope. It's not worth wasting the best years of your life feeling awful and thinking the worst of yourself. There is help available.
I understand what you mean. My parents dont believe me when I mention how I feel. Last time, my mu just told me that I was not the only one with problems and that I was over exaggerating and seekign attention.
And now she asks why I never speak to her. Why I never tell her anymore. Why I prefer to talk to people I dont know than my own mother.
My friends are my support though. They dont know the depths of my feelings, but they help me when i'm feeling low. They try and cheer me up and are the closest people to me.
I'm doing well so far I feel, xmas blues havent got me again like last year and so far I am looking forward to next year. Trying to put exams and stress out of my mind and think abotu the positive.
I've had a really high 2 days, been very happy. I've crashed again today. I don't know what to do anymore. I didn't realise how many people have picked up on it, even my Mums best friend could tell I was down. I feel like I'm completely losing my mind. I've lost control of everything. I feel completely worthless, like I can't achieve anything, I'm all over the place, I just wnat to get myself out of this, I can't face the doctors, or my family, and my friends don't understand when I'm trying to explain how I feel and make it one big joke. I can't get to sleep at night, because deep down it means I ahve to wake up the next day, so if I don't sleep, I don't have to worry about trying to start again, and then I can't get up because I'm so overtired and can't be bothered with the rest of the day because it ends up like every other.. down the drain.
You need to face the doctors and get help. Sometimes it just is too hard to get through things on your own, and there is no shame in needing help.Quote:
Originally Posted by Little Donkey
Remember that depression is an illness, you wouldn't feel bad about having the 'flu..
I absolutely agree with Holly Trinity, please get help from the doctors.
I understand how you feel, Ive had the same problems.
People can tell you go to the doctors, but they dont realise how hard it is.
Try and concentrate on the positives, I know it isnt very helpful, but its what Ive done to try and get me through.
When Im having one of my bad days, where I wont get out of bed and feel like crying, i put some of my loudest dance music on and dance around my room, making a complete fool of myself but lifting my spirits, even if only for a little while.
I also like making lists. I spose this is where my ocd for tidiness and everything being organised comes into it, but I find that by making lists of things that Im looking forward to helps. They dont have to be major events, I made one a few days ago whcih had things like "looking forward to eating my frosties for breakfast" :P
And, with the sleeping, I also understand how you feel, but it is contributing to your mood. Your in a snowball effect and its only going to keep getting worse. Try and sleep, think of it as the only place where youll be at peace from it all. You can take a chance to forget about it all, and hopefully youll wake up with a fresher take on things.
If none of this helps, even just a little bit then you should try speak to your doctor, mum or dad or friends. They are there for you and they do understand even if it doesn't seem like it.
xxx
I find that when I feel stressed out I take St Johns Wort herbal tablets, after a couple of weeks I feel much better to cope with life. Perhaps you can take them, a doctor recommended them to me and because they are herbal, you don't feel drugged up to the eyes.
Just a point of information, you can't take St Johns Wort with some anti-depressants. Don't know why (suspect something to do with serotonin) but check the labels before you take them.
I don't take anti depressants, only St Johns Wort, they do the job for me. I would always advise to check with a doctor whether they are suitable to take if somebody is on medication already.
Not exactly the same subject but I wanted to talk about Social anxiety.
Basically im at the end of my tether. I've been suffering with this problem ever since I can remember, but it has felt worse over the last few weeks.
I finished University in June and ive moved back in with my mum, and i've gone back to the same job. It feels like ive taken a step backwards, and I cant really see it changing (even though I am supposed to be going to London in April to do a journalism course, I have no motivation whatsoever).
Everyone is nice in work, but I have felt a change lately. I don't think people like me. I find myself being moody all the time, and constantly thinking about what other people think. Even when i'm not in work i'm thinking of the people in work, and what it will feel like when i go into work. I doubt myself all the time, even though ive been working there 3 years and I know what i'm doing. I havent built up any solid friendships with anyone. Everyone has fun in the job, but I always concentrate on working and I dont like it when people are chatting and messing around.
I had a thing with a guy I work with a few months ago and now he's sleeping with my boss, thats extra awkward, cos I havent told anyone, havent spoken to him about it, it's like a big thing hanging over my head! I have no proper friends, even though i have developed a couple lately there not ones i see all the time. I wouldnt feel comfortable ring them up if i had a problem.