Maddie Heath

[LizzyBizzy]

Kissinger, Anne not replying to someone who sent her a letter whilst she was undergoing cancer treatment isn't something I'd condemn her for, though each to their own opinion. I've had cancer. The treatment is as awful as you expect it to be and then worse. You face the fact that one day you'll die. We all know that, but cancer doesn't half focus the mind on mortality. You have to focus on yourself, not other people.

During my treatment, I had to be signed off work by my GP. Walking out the surgery one day, a woman held a door open for me. I didn't say thank you. The woman spoke sarcastically to her child about awful people who don't say thank you. I couldn't be bothered to respond, as I was suffering the after effects of chemotherapy at the time. I briefly thought though that if that's the worst thing that's happened to you, you should be thankful. The reason I didn't say thank you by the way was that I was in shock. There's a lot of shock/fear going round your head when having cancer treatment. What made this particular occasion worse, was my GP told me about his wife, who'd died of the same cancer I was being treated for.

[LizzyBizzy]

Kissinger, Anne not replying to someone who sent her a letter whilst she was undergoing cancer treatment isn't something I'd condemn her for, though each to their own opinion. I've had cancer. The treatment is as awful as you expect it to be and then worse. You face the fact that one day you'll die. We all know that, but cancer doesn't half focus the mind on mortality. You have to focus on yourself, not other people.

During my treatment, I had to be signed off work by my GP. Walking out the surgery one day, a woman held a door open for me. I didn't say thank you. The woman spoke sarcastically to her child about awful people who don't say thank you. I couldn't be bothered to respond, as I was suffering the after effects of chemotherapy at the time. I briefly thought though that if that's the worst thing that's happened to you, you should be thankful. The reason I didn't say thank you by the way was that I was in shock. There's a lot of shock/fear going round your head when having cancer treatment. What made this particular occasion worse, was my GP told me about his wife, who'd died of the same cancer I was being treated for.

[Perdita]

Thank you Lizzy,, your post has been very helpful to me and hopefully others ...

[Kissinger]

LIzzy Bizzy------I too have had cancer, and every note, telephone call i recieved, i replied to, no not straight away but when I was slowly recovering, i wanted to let these people know how their thoughts encouraged me. I guess as you say each to their own, mine was to thank those who took the time and trouble to think of me. I know all about thoughts in your head, whilst enduring pain beyond belief, so please try to understand my hurt!

Whilst Ann may have been in the public eye and had perhaps a fair bit of mail to deal with, it was because I had the same as her, and I was told i had weeks to live, (and of course here i still am!!)
was why I wrote and told her to be strong, not to give up hope, not an average fan i would have thought, and maybe even a family member could have stepped in and at least acknowleged my letter?

I'm sorry your doctor was foolish enough to tell you about his wife, not the most encouraging news, but the lady who held the door for you, was being kind, something you should have been polite enought to acknowlege, sorry but Cancer is not an excuse for rudeness, no matter how ill you are. Yes i've been there (twice) which is possibly why I can't not help but feel things a bit more.

But why is it the minute you dont' agree with something, everyone gets on the soapbox (sorry no pun intended) I've only just joined, but not so sure I will stay, if this is what you recieve for your contribution

[Kissinger]

LIzzy Bizzy------I too have had cancer, and every note, telephone call i recieved, i replied to, no not straight away but when I was slowly recovering, i wanted to let these people know how their thoughts encouraged me. I guess as you say each to their own, mine was to thank those who took the time and trouble to think of me.

Whilst Ann may have been in the public eye and had perhaps a fair bit of mail to deal with, it was because I had the same as her, and that I was told i had weeks to live, and of course here i still am!!
was why I wrote and told her to be strong, not to give up hope, not an average fan, i would have thought, and maybe even a family member could have stepped in.

I'm sorry your doctor was foolish enoughtto tell you about his wife, not the most encouraging news, but the lady who held the door for you, was being kind, something you should have been polite enought to acknowlege, sorry but Cancer is not an excuse for rudeness, no matter how ill you are. Yes i've been there (twice) which is possibly why I can't not feel things a bit more.

[Kissinger]

sadly not very helpful to me, I am feeling hurt and got at!

[LizzyBizzy]

Kissinger, I'm very sorry you've had cancer twice. We are all different however. I'm not being sarcastic but having cancer hasn't made me a better person. It's certainly changed my outlook on certain things though. I don't believe my doctor was foolish in telling me about his wife dying of cancer. He was being human. Which is something it's easy to forget about doctors, nurses. They have to deal with awful things in their own life too. I can't begin to imagine the emotional demands of being a GP/Consultant who may have to tell someone they're terminally ill.

It's to your credit you were able to reply to everyone who wished you well. Sadly some of us can't/didn't. I've chosen not to pack my bags for a guilt trip because I may have forgotten to thank someone. If you consider me to be rude, so be it. It's something I can live with. I should have said thank you to the lady who held the door open to me, I didn't. As you say, cancer isn't an excuse for rudeness. Through all the traumas of my treatment, some of which I won't mention because it's going into the realms of possible crudeness, hair loss, nail loss, weight gain, coping with friends dropping me like I had E-Bola, me being perceived as rude to someone is way down my list of things to worry about.

Believe it or not, I don't generally advocate giving advice on the internet, but as you feel got at, maybe it's a time for reflection.

[LizzyBizzy]

Kissinger, I'm very sorry you've had cancer twice. We are all different however. I'm not being sarcastic but having cancer hasn't made me a better person. It's certainly changed my outlook on certain things though. I don't believe my doctor was foolish in telling me about his wife dying of cancer. He was being human. Which is something it's easy to forget about doctors, nurses. They have to deal with awful things in their own life too. I can't begin to imagine the emotional demands of being a GP/Consultant who may have to tell someone they're terminally ill.

It's to your credit you were able to reply to everyone who wished you well. Sadly some of us can't/didn't. I've chosen not to pack my bags for a guilt trip because I may have forgotten to thank someone. If you consider me to be rude, so be it. It's something I can live with. I should have said thank you to the lady who held the door open to me, I didn't. As you say, cancer isn't an excuse for rudeness. Through all the traumas of my treatment, some of which I won't mention because it's going into the realms of possible crudeness, hair loss, nail loss, weight gain, coping with friends dropping me like I had E-Bola, me being perceived as rude to someone is way down my list of things to worry about.

Believe it or not, I don't generally advocate giving advice on the internet, but as you feel got at, maybe it's a time for reflection.

[Dazzle]

Thanks for telling us your story, LizzyBizzy.

...surely we are allowed to say what we think with moderation...

Just as we are allowed to challenge what you say.

OH you do like to judge people for their views, why not stick to what this board is for, judging soaps and the characters etc.

Just to be clear it was neither a judgement on a soap nor a character, but an unnecessary personal attack on Anne that I was commenting on.

...I wrote and told her to be strong, not to give up hope, not an average fan i would have thought, and maybe even a family member could have stepped in and at least acknowleged my letter?

I'm sure she would have appreciated your letter had she read it, but the fact is that it's unlikely she did. She would have received thousands of such letters and would never have had the time to read and answer them all.

Celebrities are under no moral obligation to read and reply to every fan letter, even if it's possible. They do have lives outside their work, which is especially important to those recovering from serious illness such as Anne was at the time.

[lizann]

back on track i will miss maddie