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  1. #17
    Join Date
    Aug 2014
    Location
    Sydney, Australia
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    Arriving home, a husband was met by his sobbing wife. Tearfully she explained, "The Chemist. He insulted me this morning on the phone.
    I had to call multiple times before he would even answer the phone."

    The husband drove down to confront the Chemist to demand an apology.

    Before he could say more than a word or two, the Chemist said "Now, just a minute... hear my side of it.

    This morning the alarm failed to go off, so I was late.

    Without breakfast I hurried out to the car, to realise I'd locked the house with house and car keys inside. I had to break a window to get my keys.."

    "Driving a little too fast, I got a speeding ticket.

    About three streets from the store, I had a flat tyre."

    "When I finally got to the store a bunch of people were waiting for me to open up.

    I started waiting on these people,

    All the time the damn phone never stopped ringing."

    "Then I had to break open a bag of pound coins against the cash register drawer to give change, and they spilled all over the floor

    I had to get down on my hands and knees to pick up the pound coins and the phone was still ringing.

    When I came up I cracked my head on the open cash drawer, which made me stagger back against a showcase with bottles of expensive perfumes on it.

    Half of them hit the floor and broke."

    "Meanwhile, the phone is still ringing with no let up, and I finally got to answer it.

    It was your wife. She wanted to know how to use a rectal thermometer.

    And believe me, mate, as God is my witness, all I did was tell her."

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