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Thread: Jokes

  1. #381
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    What do you call an Italian beggar?

    Giovanni Change

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  3. #382
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    A truckie walks into an outback cafe with a full-grown emu behind him.
    The waitress asks them for their orders.
    The truckie says, 'A hamburger, chips and a coke,' and turns to the emu, 'What's yours?'
    'Sounds great, I'll have the same,' says the emu.
    A short time later the waitress returns with the order 'That will be $9.40 please,' and he reaches into his pocket and pulls out the exact change and pays.
    The next day, the man and the emu come again and he says, 'A hamburger, chips and a coke.'
    The emu says, ' Sounds great, I'll have the same.'
    Again the truckie reaches into his pocket and pays with exact change.
    This becomes routine until the two enter again. 'The usual?' asks the waitress.
    'No, it's Friday night, so I'll have a steak, baked potato and a salad,' says the man..
    ' Same for me,' says the emu.
    Shortly the waitress brings the order and says, 'That will be $32.62.'
    Once again the man pulls the exact change out of his pocket and places it on the table.
    The waitress cannot hold back her curiosity any longer. 'Excuse me mate, how do you manage to always pull the exact change from your pocket every time?'
    'Well, love' says the truckie, 'a few years ago, I was cleaning out the back shed, and found an old lamp. When I cleaned it, a Genie appeared and offered me two wishes.
    My first wish was that if I ever had to pay for anything, I would just put my hand in my pocket and the right amount of money would always be there.'
    'That's brilliant!' says the waitress. 'Most people would ask for a million dollars or something, but you'll always be as rich as you want, for as long as you live!'
    'That's right. Whether it's a gallon of milk or a Rolls Royce, the exact money is always there.' says the man.
    Still curious the waitress asks, 'What's with the bloody emu?'
    The truckie pauses, sighs, and answers, 'My second wish was for a tall bird with a big **** and long legs, who agrees with everything I say!!
    Last edited by Perdita; 16-11-2021 at 09:45.

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  5. #383
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    Quote Originally Posted by lizann View Post
    What do you call an Italian beggar? Giovanni Change
    That was so bad, it is good
    Super Mod

  6. #384
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    A cracker joke

    Why did no one bid for Rudolph and Blitzen on eBay? Because they were two deer

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  8. #385
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    A woman in labor suddenly shouted, ?Shouldn?t! Wouldn?t! Couldn?t! Didn?t! Can?t!?
    ?Don?t worry,? said the doc. ?Those are just contractions.?

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  10. #386
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    What did Santa sing when he went down the chimney?

    Chestnuts roasting on an open fire.....

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    Pantherboy (13-12-2023), Perdita (12-12-2023)

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