'24's Day Seven - The Awards
After the stale Day Six, the latest season of 24 was a remarkably consistent return to form. With Big Bads giving way to Bigger Bads like some kind of terrorist Russian Doll, Day Seven was packed full of shocking thrills, great cliffhangers, effective human drama and a cougar-free Kim Bauer. In memory of Bill Buchanan and his superb blow-dry hairstyle, let's dish out some awards for the best and worst of these memorable 24 hours....
Best Gurner
Jon Voight's acting prowess is undeniable and his casting as the ruthless Jonas Hodges was a masterstroke. Yet some of his over-the-top facial expressions, especially when angered, could have put him in pole position at the World Gurning Championships. This mugging looked like someone had wired up Voight's facial muscles to a remote control while someone over-enthusiastically twiddled the knobs just off camera. The acclaimed actor and spawner of Angelina Jolie does have history on this front - just rent the DVD of Anaconda to see him in overacting overdrive.
Biggest Waste
The evil aura surrounding the human butcher General Juma was nicely built up in 24: Redemption and it wasn't too long before the barbarian surfaced on US shores for a cunningly plotted White House attack. Portrayed by chilling Candyman legend Tony Todd, it looked like Jack Bauer had a fierce adversary on his hands. Yet despite the hype, he barely lasted a couple of hours before he was sadly gunned down! Not even saying 'General Juma' five times in front of a mirror could bring him back...
Biggest Shock
Tony Almeida's murder of Agent Moss was simply stunning. We'd just learnt to trust the former CTU legend and his dodgy lower lip hair again, only for the treacherous snake to kill off a beloved new character and prevent Moss from locking lips with Agent Walker again! Incredibly, Almeida managed to regain some sympathy in the season finale when his true motivation of revenge for his wife's death came to the fore. His moving "you killed my son" rant at Alan Wilson was terrific drama.
Cattiest Bitchfest
No doubt about it - Chloe O'Brian's conflict with fellow analyst Janis Gold really put the MIAOWWW factor into 24 this year. Bickering over firewalls and security protocols when forced to work together, it led to Janis receiving the full on hairdryer treatment from a frothing at the mouth Jack Bauer after she became jealous of Chloe's higher status. Still, by the end of the season the pair managed to trade compliments and are probably planning to link up for a game of World Of Warcraft sometime soon.
Best Emperor Dalek Impression
Tony Almeida's revelation that he wanted to "harvest" Jack Bauer's contaminated internal organs as a means to recreate the lethal pathogen had strong echoes of a certain villain in Doctor Who episode 'The Parting Of The Ways'. Just listen to the Dalek Emperor's following words to see the parallel with 24: "Centuries passed and we quietly infiltrated the systems of Earth. Harvesting the waste of humanity, the prisoners, the refugees, the dispossessed, they all came to us. The bodies were filleted, pulped, sifted, the seed of the Human race is perverted, only one cell in a billion was fit to be nurtured!" Obviously the Emperor never encountered Senor Bauer.
The Aviation Industry PR Award
For anyone who had a fear of flying before watching Day Seven of 24, it was unlikely that the ensuing events did anything to address such a phobia. In fact, it gives credence to the old saying 'If God wanted man to fly he'd have given him wings'. Not only did Dubaku bring down a plane by overriding air traffic control, and almost cause further catastrophes, but even the airport departure lounges turned out to be a source of danger for passengers caught in a Kim Bauer-based gunfight!
Most Unwanted Hospital Visitor
Placing Jack Bauer at risk of death is always a double-edged sword, as we know that his survival is integral to 24 continuing and the show was recommissioned for Day Eight a while ago. So when it emerged midway through the season that Jack could only survive with stem cells from his estranged daughter Kim, it was blindingly predictable that she would somehow end up delivering the goods. Plenty of to-ing and fro-ing occurred and Jack was all set to die in hospital in the latter stages of the season.
Then a visitor shows up... and it's the imam Muhtadi Gohar! Brilliant! An unexpected and sublime route into spirituality saw Jack being purged of his guilt and making peace. Then, predictably, Kim shows up afterwards and spoils this surprise but welcome detour.
The Will He/Won't He Award
Special Agent Aaron Pierce undoubtedly has a heart of gold, but he does have a history of canoodling with manipulative women in the White House. Disgraced former President Charles Logan's wife Martha was certainly on his radar. So was his initally overprotective stance towards the sneaky President's daughter Olivia the sign of something stirring in Pierce's loins? The intrigue rumbled on for a while, but he eventually chose to do the right thing and expose Olivia's role in the death of Jonas Hodges instead of anything untoward