To be in a British soap...

[Abbie]

I think its clear to say that to be in a soap there are certain....guidelines and rules to follow


For example for any of our british soaps you have to:

Be able to pull a pint
Have a disfunctional family
Have a deep, drak secret
Have a family that no one else likes
Someone has to die on xmas day
generally a few deaths a year
Have a pint thrown over you



Where as for corrie

you have to sew knickers, otherwise you'll never get a job


Eastenders

Work on a stall
Or own a business
Have peggy shout 'get outta my pub' at ya



Hollyoaks

be a rusbbish young actor


Emmerdale
I couldnt think of one sorry



So what do you think? Its true though isnt it?
Can you think or anymore?

[Perdita]

In Emmerdale it would be helpful if you could tell the difference between the front end and back end of a cow and sheep. Then the rest of the general points you already quoted :D

[Chloe O'brien]

You have to have a name from the Bible to be a Dingle.

[StarsOfCCTV]

Hollyoaks
be a rubbish young actor
- You might think your straight but really anything goes
- You have a probable chance of sleeping with your sisters husband
- You have a never ending stream of random relatives

[*-Rooney-*]

You have to have a name from the Bible to be a Dingle.

do you notice they are never simple normal names from the bible though like joseph, matthew, mary etc (sorry im not big on the bible lol)

And to work in eastenders you have to either

- have an affair, or
- kill someone or at least try to

[CrazyLea]

To be in Eastenders -
- You must not own a washing machine. If you are lucky enough to actually own one, then it must break down at least 3 times a week.

[Bad Wolf]

corrie:


ability to sew/ cut hair/ work in a shop/ in a cafe or bookies while DRUNK- as t'everyone goes the pub for lunch
work on cobbles streets in heels- no easy feet (geddit??)
have the cash to afford taxi's everwhere
eastenders:

not own a washing machine or have no memory or ability of where to buy one
see point one for corrie- substitute market stall for sew knickers
to look for employment less than 100 meters from you home - think this applies to both corrie and eastenders
hollyoaks

have a small army or never mentioned relatives who are slighty more interesting than you to be able to extend your contract at short notice, think warrens soon to be arriving brother with learning difficulties, zak's disabled sister, zoe's brother who she hasnt actually met on screen yet, nancy started off like this, as did most of the mcqueens- michela was on her own at first.
get married at a crazy young age- like mercy, russ, tony, and countless others
be able to hop on and off a teacher training course when it suits
aussie soaps

have nine plus lives- especially if you live in a sea side town called summer bay.........

[Katy]

Eastenders / Corrie

Have a house that has been built by the well known company, Tardis Housing. An average size house that manages to fit endless number of people in there.
Barlows / Slaters were the ones that spring to mind.

[Siobhan]

In all soaps you get pregnant and not know who the father is but it is always the one you don't want it to be and an enemy of your current partner

[Perdita]

And the credit crunch does not affect anybody apart from an old miser because they are still going to cafes for their breakfasts/cuppa and the pub every day.

[Debs]

In all soaps you get pregnant and not know who the father is but it is always the one you don't want it to be and an enemy of your current partner


and dont forget everything else that could go wrong WILL go wrong! and on top of father dilemma you will probably end up with some major illness to!!!

[Siobhan]

Oh and never get married cause
1) the day itself will be a disaster
2) you will end up sleeping with someone else anyway and
3) someone will interupt to reveal a big secret!

[Perdita]

And the secret is found out by you leaving sensitive information in crisp boxes, for example, your foes are always looking out of the window when you are doing something you should not and private conversations are always overheard by the wrong people.

[*-Rooney-*]

you will cheat on your partner with a member of their family, (Stacy/Max, Leanne/Danny baldwin, Tanya/Jack, Bianca/Dan, Roxy/ Jack, Katie/Robert for example)

Pregnancys and babies never have an easy time of it, Amy Slater, Daniel Thomas, Charlie Dean, Baby paul connor

[Abbie]

To be in Eastenders -
- You must not own a washing machine. If you are lucky enough to actually own one, then it must break down at least 3 times a week.

:lol: I knew I missed one out!