View Full Version : A general comment from me
Apologies if I offend anyone here, but its something that I've been feeling this for a while now, and I have to post my thoughts.
I posted a thread a bit like this, a year ago ish. Older members, who are still here, may remember.
I have always enjoyed coming here, enjoying friendly chat and banter with old and new friends. Sadly though, of late, things seems to have changed.
So many general discussion threads, end up embroiled in either an argument, or a political discussion and I don't come here for that. I come here for some light hearted chat with friends, not to get into political debates (or read political debates) about mine or other peoples opinions.
I've noticed a lot of members have gone very quiet, or have disappeared altogether. There aren't very many new posts each day either (I remember going through 1000 posts of a weekend if I hadn't visited, not 200 max like it is these days) and I'm starting to realise why.
I thought we prided ourselves on not being a bitchy forum, instead being a forum that enjoyed forging new friendships and firming up old ones. But, for me, this seems to be changing. Arguments, sarcasm (whether subtle or outright) to each other seem to be coming more and more frequent, and whether its because the posters don't realise their post reads in that way or not, I don't know, but I don't come here for this.
With 3 children and another on the way, I want to be able to sit and relax when I'm on here, enjoy myself, not find myself getting more and more upset or angry.
I'm probably the only one who feels this way, I don't know, but I'm of an age where I'm not going to keep quiet and I will say the above, as its how I'm feeling.
This isn't directed at anyone, its a general comment, so I don't want anyone taking offence to what I have said here. But I did always think that SB's was different to other forums (DS for example) because we didn't have the bitchiness etc that some others have. And I just don't want to see that change and would like to welcome back any members who have gone quiet, perhaps for the same reasons that I have given.
:)
I, too, have noticed a fall off in the number of posts here.
I would put at least some of the reduction in posts down to the gawd awful state of TV soaps over the last while :rolleyes:
I hope that I haven't offended anyone - but if I have I am sorry. I agree with Emz, bitchiness is a turn off. The comments should be aimed at the TV shows we are discussing and personnal attacks against fellow Soapboarders.
DaVeyWaVey
06-07-2007, 17:22
I am also sorry if i have offended anyone with any of my posts. I know i've posted less and less in the soaps section of the forum now, down to me stopping watching most soaps bar Hollyoaks and occasionally EE. :)
Chloe O'brien
06-07-2007, 21:24
I tend to stay away from posting from the soap threads, mainly because I rarely watch them so I don't like to coment on something that I haven't seen, for example I wouldn't make a comment about Stacey's top in EE if I hadn't seen it just to boost my posts up.
I have noticed a reduction of post as well especially at the weekend I don't normally come on until night time but there may only be about 100 posts for that day. I have not been on SB as much as I used to be but that is down to personal circumstances. last year I was working almost full-time and there was just me and my boss in the office with him out at meetings most of the time, basically I used to be on here most of the day. Now I only work 20 hours a week but I still have a high level of workload so its not possible to get on everyday. This is the first day I've been on in four days because of the I've just not had the time.
As for the bitchiness I try to avoid it when possible, I'm not a nasty person until someone really hacks me off and as I said earlier if I don't watch a particular episode or programme then I'm not going to slag it or the actors off as I would hate for members to slag of the programmes that I enjoy without viewing them.
I've noticed that, too. I think there are a few more arguments these days, but I think the decrease in posting rates is down to the storylines of the soaps, and I think some joined around the dates of the more significant storylines, which don't happen often now. With a lot more of the members doing GCSE's, A Levels and degrees now, I also think that that could have had an influence, as well.
Just incase anyone was wondering why I hadn't been on for weeks; my internet messed up just after the MSN quiz that I took part in, and it only started working properly yesterday.
CrazyLea
06-07-2007, 22:23
I agree 100% with what you're saying Ems. I know that, although I have been here, I have posted less, due to worry that I may get criticised (sp?) or something like that. Which is not what I want from posting an opinion that I hold.
Well done to you for bringing this up by the way, can't have been easy, but I can tell from the number of thanks you've had, that you are not alone :).
DaVeyWaVey
06-07-2007, 22:37
I have to say though, despite all the negatives, this is by far, the best board that i've joined. I've made so many great friends here and your all so kind, even if there is the odd disagreement or argument at times. I would never criticise someone of their opinion as i respect and i'm aware of myself and others viewpoints.
I didn't know i would get so attached to this board when i first joined, but i did, and this is purely because of the kind people and friendly and lovely atmosphere on here. :)
Chloe O'brien
06-07-2007, 22:49
On a positive note can I just say that yes I have noticed that although some members who were active posters in the last year have either disapeared or reduced their interaction, but on a possitive note there has been members who have been shy to talk in the past that have now become more involved.And I have made new friends to the ones I had. So some good has come out of your post Ems as it may give the members who are being bitchy a reality check or the newer members the courage to talk on shoutbox or post more. Whatever Ems you should be congratulated for speaking out.
JustJodi
06-07-2007, 23:02
To all of you who have posted, I want to thank you for saying what you did, and I applaud Em for having the cojones to speak out.
I know I post all the time, but that is just the episode guide, and once in a while I post a new thread..
I try to stay out of the political part, cos I am not a Brit and i do not really know the innies or the outties of your Political system. So I stay out of that unless it is something I actually know something about ( like the smoking ban )
I too noticed the amount of posts were down, I remember last year there was thousands of posts, could it be that the quality of the programs we have been watching gone down the tubes ??:searchme:
I am so grateful for the wonderful friends I have made here and I cherish each and every one of you ( you know who you are ) And I look forward coming on here to see if those friends are here, if not I try to seek them out on MSN, granted we all lead different lives, we all may not have all the time to spare to chat with each other, but we do keep in contact..all I can say is I am thankful I discovered the SB's its by far the nicest site :) and some really nice folks who has put up with my rubbish :p
LONG LIVE THE SOAP BOARDS
To be honest i kind of agree, there has definitly been a reduction in posts, but that could be due to time of year. We have on MFF as well and people have gone on holiday but you are right in general theres less activity.
I'm sure it will improve.
.:SpIcYsPy:.
07-07-2007, 17:10
As you know I think the same too Emz and I want to thank-you for starting this thread. A year ago or something I ALWAYS used to post here nearly everyday and I was an addict! I'm not as addicted to posting on boards now as you may have noticed but I do read posts when I have time. I mainly browse around really quickly as I have been very busy with my GCSE mocks, holidays and other stuff, same with last year but with SATs. It will probably be the same case as I got my proper GCSE's next year but I will try and contribute when I have time once again, during the holiday prehaps.
There were 3 main places where I usually post, one being the EE forum.. I don't post as much nowadays as I only watch it when I remember, before I used to watch it quite religiously! I have missed quite a few episodes and I still don't know where Ben is! I know I will be missing more in the future so yeah.. I only really post when I find something quite shocking or unexpected and when there are good things to say from other members. Started to watch Hollyoaks quite a bit now! I don't know any of the characters that well do haven't posted much there yet!
I used to post in the Entertainment section eg. Big Brother! I hardly watch that nowadays as I find it to late to watch on a school night. Though I stay up quite late it sort of delays my 'schedule' on a school night haha. My fav. forum used to be the General Discussion forum I would say I haven't posted there because I been busy with everything etc.!
Once again thanks for bringing this up :) x
A year ago or something I ALWAYS used to post here nearly everyday and I was an addict! I'm not as addicted to posting on boards now as you may have noticed but I do read posts when I have time.
Well you sure have made up for it today.:p Welcome back Ive missed you many posts:)
samantha nixon
07-07-2007, 19:54
I have noticed, the less posts aswell, but this site isnt what it used to be anyway, no one used to bitch about people in threads and moan at their oppinions ( i know i have done this so i aint moaning at people lol), and other people have been driven away from the board cos of what people have said.
The main topic i used to post in was the bill, but im not as interested in the show and there isnt that many bill fans on here now anyway.
so i only relly read posts now every now and then and sometimes post, i have posted more today than i have in a long time and i think ive only made 5posts!
This was the best forum i had been on when i first joined, but slowly its becoming like Ds minus the amount of replies they get
I have noticed, the less posts aswell, but this site isnt what it used to be anyway, no one used to bitch about people in threads and moan at their oppinions ( i know i have done this so i aint moaning at people lol), and other people have been driven away from the board cos of what people have said.
The main topic i used to post in was the bill, but im not as interested in the show and there isnt that many bill fans on here now anyway.
so i only relly read posts now every now and then and sometimes post, i have posted more today than i have in a long time and i think ive only made 5posts!
This was the best forum i had been on when i first joined, but slowly its becoming like Ds minus the amount of replies they get
As someone who used to regularly 'argue' with you here I think we have come to respect each others views. Now that is something which NEVER happens on DS. BTW I still dislike your namesake on The Bill:p but not you as a person or poster:angel:
samantha nixon
07-07-2007, 20:03
I have noticed, the less posts aswell, but this site isnt what it used to be anyway, no one used to bitch about people in threads and moan at their oppinions ( i know i have done this so i aint moaning at people lol), and other people have been driven away from the board cos of what people have said.
The main topic i used to post in was the bill, but im not as interested in the show and there isnt that many bill fans on here now anyway.
so i only relly read posts now every now and then and sometimes post, i have posted more today than i have in a long time and i think ive only made 5posts!
This was the best forum i had been on when i first joined, but slowly its becoming like Ds minus the amount of replies they get
As someone who used to regularly 'argue' with you here I think we have come to respect each others views. Now that is something which NEVER happens on DS. BTW I still dislike your namesake on The Bill:p but not you as a person or poster:angel:
Yeah I used to always argue with you lol, and if I had actually stoped arguing for a while then I would have realised your posts are actually really good and a good contribution lol.
Thats another reason why I stopped posting in the bill section to stop me arguing with people
I have noticed, the less posts aswell, but this site isnt what it used to be anyway, no one used to bitch about people in threads and moan at their oppinions ( i know i have done this so i aint moaning at people lol), and other people have been driven away from the board cos of what people have said.
The main topic i used to post in was the bill, but im not as interested in the show and there isnt that many bill fans on here now anyway.
so i only relly read posts now every now and then and sometimes post, i have posted more today than i have in a long time and i think ive only made 5posts!
This was the best forum i had been on when i first joined, but slowly its becoming like Ds minus the amount of replies they get
As someone who used to regularly 'argue' with you here I think we have come to respect each others views. Now that is something which NEVER happens on DS. BTW I still dislike your namesake on The Bill:p but not you as a person or poster:angel:
Yeah I used to always argue with you lol, and if I had actually stoped arguing for a while then I would have realised your posts are actually really good and a good contribution lol.
Thats another reason why I stopped posting in the bill section to stop me arguing with peoplePost away as long as you dont keep raving about the METS worst detective
Thanks for this, I have noticed today that there are a lot more posts than there usually are when I come on.
I know I've been bitchy in some threads and I apologise for that.
I think we need more games. I know that they are time consuming for the game leader but they are such good fun and lots of people get involved. The Deal Or No Deal game was a huge success and it would be great to have more games like that (even another round maybe??). I know we have the Murder Game coming up (:thumbsup: ) but after that it would be good to see another game.
I totally understand what you mean about the amount of posts falling and I know Im guilty of that due to exams and stuff that had caused me to pull myself away from the internet and not spent as much time on here and I am trying to get back to posting as much as I did and I do really try but I havent watched as much as my soaps lately so I would find it unfair to post in those threads and as soon as I can Im going to get back into watching them again cos I have missed them and then I will be back to posting. Its other areas like general disscusion where I find a real lack of what to chat about, I can never thing of anything and sometimes In the past I have came in here and its ben weeks since a new thread was posted. I would love it if we could get back to the way we used to be cos I tend to always have lots to say, even if it is just a little comment in different topics.
Ive never really had a issue with agruments, I think I can remember one time, wasnt such an argument but it was dealt with quickly and really there isnt a need. I mean everyone is entilted to an opinion but you still have to think about what you say and how you say it.
I didnt think we had many polictal debates but if people wanted to have them (debates) and such serious talks we suppose have a serious disccssion board or something so it was kept seperate and didnt get on the way of other things such as turning a light hearted chat into a debate, anywayss its only a suggestion, if it was to help things out.
Anyway thankyou so much for bringing this up :) I hope I havent said anything to offend anyone, dont think I have however I feel like Ive rambeled on lol
Thanks for this, I have noticed today that there are a lot more posts than there usually are when I come on.
I know I've been bitchy in some threads and I apologise for that.
I think we need more games. I know that they are time consuming for the game leader but they are such good fun and lots of people get involved. The Deal Or No Deal game was a huge success and it would be great to have more games like that (even another round maybe??). I know we have the Murder Game coming up (:thumbsup: ) but after that it would be good to see another game.
Were planning an xfactor style game which should be a hoot.
The problem is most posters register with a free email address that they never check. So in time they forget about SBs. I sent out a reminder email last week and a lot of the hotmail accounts bounced. One of the reasons of getting dedicated hosting is so we can have more features on the site which hopefully will encourage more people to join in.
As for people being bitchy etc, I guess that's just human nature. I would like to see less of bitchiness and more discussion as that what the forums are for. The forums have had their ups and downs so I hope its all up from here.
Its so easy to post something without givin a reason for it. At least if I say EE is Crapor discusss the merits of smoking I give my reasons for it rather than making a post and then refusing to justify it or present a reasoned argument for my point of view
SarahWakefield
08-07-2007, 03:16
Obviously aimed at me!
That's in the past! Must you still mention it?
Obviously aimed at me!
That's in the past! Must you still mention it?Sorry to disappoint you but NO it wasnt. I was giving an opinion in response to another post. I have already told you that I would not be discussing the merits of the smoking ban with you as it proved a pointless and futile excercise. Just ignore my posts as I will yours and then we will both be happy:)
Sometimes you have to agree to disagree and move on!
Ok sorry.
In other words - Why was it me causing an argument and not letting go? - All I said was, I thought it was aimed at me and can HE not let it go!?
Seems it's best not to say anything at all.
Not being funny but instead of carrying it on with comment like the quote you made (the one that disappered) why dont you just be the bigger person and let it go???
if you make comments like that then people will keep going on and on!
i thought this thread was made because of things like this!
samantha nixon
08-07-2007, 19:41
People arent getting at you, if other people answer like that then people would probably say the same to them.
If you think im getting at you then im sorry, I only replied to say that you were actually telling the truth and that you had actually replied
Behemoth
08-07-2007, 20:24
I deleted the post because you were continuing an argument. People don't come to this board to see members having a go at each other. General discussion and debate is fine; in fact, we encourage it. Making snide remarks about other members is not fine. I'm going to comb through the last few pages on this thread and remove any inappropriate posts.
Can we please get back on topic?
I agree Em. I used to be on here loads, i had to come on at least once a day to check posts and talk to people, but now i hardly come on at all, and when i do i really don't post alot. Back in the day (the beginnings of Soapboards) there used to be jokey things, and races to see who got so many posts first and stuff like that, but now everything seems to be very proper in a way, if you comment something it has to make sense and mean something otherwise it gets ignored or argued. Fair enough i have been rather busy of late what with exams and things, and therefore i don't have the time to come on as much as i used to, but when i do come on i want to read up on things i'm interested in and have a chat with people, i don't want to have to argue or feel bad about a message i posted.
Alot like Layne, I haven't really been on alot due to exams and personal things. When I joined it was great - I posted most days and you could post without having to argue your point. I've posted less and less recently because I stopped watching EE and didn't have anything to talk about. It was only a week ago when the Spice Girls got back together that I started posting again and that turned into an argument. I know I was involved but it just got to me that alot of members seem to negative about alot of things on here (sorry if you feel this was directed at you - I'm just talking in general).
I hope this gets sorted out and SBs can be like it used to be again :)
Alot like Layne, I haven't really been on alot due to exams and personal things. When I joined it was great - I posted most days and you could post without having to argue your point. I've posted less and less recently because I stopped watching EE and didn't have anything to talk about. It was only a week ago when the Spice Girls got back together that I started posting again and that turned into an argument. I know I was involved but it just got to me that alot of members seem to negative about alot of things on here (sorry if you feel this was directed at you - I'm just talking in general).
I hope this gets sorted out and SBs can be like it used to be again :)
The Spice Girls thread didnt turn into an argument. You and others thought one thing about them somme of us thought differently. You gave you point of view but nobody criticised you. They may have disagreed. In fact I posted a lovely link on it just for you
There have been a lot of threads going off topic recently (I'm definatly guilty of that) and quite a few people have been getting into heated debates (me included).
In the grand scheme of things though, there are lots of people in the world worse off than ourselves. There is so much evil and bad things happening in the world and its so nice to come on here and have a bit of light-hearted chat and banter. Can we not all agree put our differences and opinions aside and get back to how we were before the bitchiness began? I know we're all entitled to our own opinions etc and thats great, after all it would be really boring if we all thought the same, but there's a difference between a healthy debate and an argument.
I've had a thought. Maybe we can have a "Gripes" thread where we can post messages if something in another thread is annoying/upsetting us. We can post exactly what is on our mind (without mentioning members) and... I dunno, just something where we can vent and try to avoid/resolve all this bitchiness before it gets out of hand.
DaVeyWaVey
08-07-2007, 22:54
That is a brilliant idea JB. Atleast if any disagreements or offensiveness did occur, it would be raised all in one place and dealt with in a much more organised way...instead of disagreements etc being spread about here, there and everywhere around the board.
Pinkbanana
08-07-2007, 23:29
I think peeps on here are not posting as much for a number of reasons, such as D1 (most entertaining member 2006) have moved abroad, or peeps like Little Mo have gone to uni, or maybe because the 'big soap' storylines which peeps posted frequently on are over (the Bradley and Stacey thread use to be particularly active last year).
IMO there use to be alot more debating/arguing threads last year. I remember some getting closed down because they were deemed to be too heated! So I dont think that its due to this at people havent been posting so regularly. I think its just the way things go. Hopefully there will be an up surge again in posts.:)
SarahWakefield
09-07-2007, 01:29
I deleted the post because you were continuing an argument. People don't come to this board to see members having a go at each other. General discussion and debate is fine; in fact, we encourage it. Making snide remarks about other members is not fine. I'm going to comb through the last few pages on this thread and remove any inappropriate posts.
Can we please get back on topic?
Ok I am sorry, I apologise if I offended anyone.
Alot like Layne, I haven't really been on alot due to exams and personal things. When I joined it was great - I posted most days and you could post without having to argue your point. I've posted less and less recently because I stopped watching EE and didn't have anything to talk about. It was only a week ago when the Spice Girls got back together that I started posting again and that turned into an argument. I know I was involved but it just got to me that alot of members seem to negative about alot of things on here (sorry if you feel this was directed at you - I'm just talking in general).
I hope this gets sorted out and SBs can be like it used to be again :)
The Spice Girls thread didnt turn into an argument. You and others thought one thing about them somme of us thought differently. You gave you point of view but nobody criticised you. They may have disagreed. In fact I posted a lovely link on it just for you
Sorry - I've just re-read what I said yesterday and it didn't really make sense. All I was trying to say was that some things are bound to make people take sides - it's understandable - but not everything that gets posted should cause a heated debate.
That doesn't really make much sense either... :rolleyes:
JB - that's a great idea. I think it would work alot better than having all of these arguments spread everywhere and that way everything gets resolved quicker and everyone stays happy (hopefully). I guess it'd be sort-of like the diary room only better :)
JB - that's a great idea. I think it would work alot better than having all of these arguments spread everywhere and that way everything gets resolved quicker and everyone stays happy (hopefully). I guess it'd be sort-of like the diary room only better :)
Also, it means that people can carry on posting relevant comments in the thread instead of getting embroiled in something else.
I have another idea, maybe there could be a debate section in the general discussion forum. Thats very popular on another forum i'm on, they discuss everything from politics to that really awful 2012 logo thingy. It could work. By having it as the debate section there is evidently going to be constructive agreement and disagreement.
I dont see the need for another section on here for debating/arguing, Everyone has their own opinions and is entitled to argue their point of view. After all thats what a forum is about. Obviously some people get more emotionally involved than others and may get carried away in the heat of the matter. I feel as long as it does not descend into open warfare with name calling then this is fine. If someone makes a post which I disagree with I feel that I should be allowed to make my point and argue and dispute any counter argument with my own views.
If the Mods decide that a matter has gone to far and issue a yellow card that should be the end of the matter, whether or not you disagree with their decision. (Thats what the PM system is for, you can then discuss you views and reasons with them without getting into an argument with them in an open forum drawing others into another argument or taking sides)
All in all this board is well moderated and everyone gets a great deal of freedom of speech. Obviously we will never all agree on all issues but lets not that stop us from putting forward our views.
i used to be on, but this year everything has got a lot more hectic, and i have had to do stuff, but i haven't been posting much because i don't really watch the bill that much anymore meaning that i can't post there, and then in some threads i've felt inclined not to post in case i get lynched for my views. but hopefully i'll be around sometime soon for longer.
Powered by vBulletin® Version 4.2.3 Copyright © 2025 vBulletin Solutions, Inc. All rights reserved.