Age gaps

[soxmox]

Hi I could really do with some advice.

I am 16 and i really like a guy whos 28. we get on really well and we're always there for each other (we have had hard times - both used to self harm). he said no one can make him laugh the way i can. i really believe he likes me the way i like him.

if we did get together do you think it would be ok with a 12 year gap? my dad really likes him so i think he'd be ok with it.

cheers. xxx

[crazygirl]

i cant comment really on this guy because i dont know him but most of the time in these sort of cases the guy is always taking advantage of the girl so be very careful! i personally dont agree in guys seeing young girls like yourself i think its wrong but hey its up to you at the end of the day what you do its your life soxmox!
when i met my boyfriend he was 18 and i was 23 and i thought that was bad!!!!

[willsmummy]

I'd tread carefully. 12 years isn't really a problem when you are a bit older, but the difference between a 16 year old and a 28 year old is quite a big one, in that he may well be looking for different things from a relationship than you (marriage, kids etc) If you want these things, that's fine, but be sure that's what you want. Just don't rush into anything. You have your whole life ahead of you.

Good luck with whatever you decide-if he makes you happy and takes care of you, it doesn't matter how old he is.

[snapper]

I was 19 and my boyfriend was 36, with a 12 year old son. It was a good relationship as we were friends before anything else happened.

I am now 30, married to a 35 year old. My husband wants a fling with a 20 year old :angry: - I think its an early midlife crisis, but thats a whole topic in its own right.

Only you know how you truely feel, so follow your instincts - take things slowly!

[LostVoodoo]

if we did get together do you think it would be ok with a 12 year gap? my dad really likes him so i think he'd be ok with it.

i would doubt that, no matter how nice the guy is i'm sure any dad would not like the idea...

[Kim]

I wouldn't worry too much about that age gap but as you are only 16 I think it is a bit much just now. When you're in your 20s people wouldn't see it as such a problem and I think it would benefit you to wait a bit aswell.

[lollymay]

Personally i wouldnt go out with anyone even 3 years older than myself. My boyfriend is 18 and i am 16, and this does create some problems like when he goes out to the clubs etc i cant go with him as i am underage for that. also you could have very different perspecitives on things for example, lifestyle.

[di marco]

i think when youre 16, a 12 year age gap is quite a lot, as 16 year olds and 28 year olds are very different, at 16, id say even going out with a 24 year old would be a big gap, but then thats just me. every situations different and it could be the right thing for you to do, but personally, id just stay friends with him til youre a bit older (maybe 20 or something)

[soxmox]

thanks guys. obviously its a tough one but i am gonna be careful about it. :)

[leanne27]

i think if you trust this guy and love him - and he feels the same way then i dont see any problem with the age difference? who says age makes up a person??? i wish you luck as people may often critisise your relasonship unfortunately only based on your ages