Is University Really The Be All and End All?

[jstevens1]

Dear Mordor & Co.

Tommy + Angela Harris thought so and it led to tragedy.

It can be so easy as parents to put their own aspirations before their children's feelings. i.e. they push their children into career moves which may be of the parent's choice and not that of their young adolescent. Here is a brief background ...
Angela + Tommy had to get married because Angie was expecting Katy. The couple were very young and had to give up their hopes + dreams of going to University. Katy turned out to be very intelligent and was keeping on top of her schoolwork before the family had to leave their home town, changing their names etc.. They therefore had aspirations for Katy to get good GCSEs then A'levels, then go on to University, have a high-flying career, get married, grandchildren .... all in that order. Katy, however, felt under a lot of pressure, she missed schooling and failed her GCSEs and had to resit them. She also had diabetes and fell in love with the male nurse that was treating her - Martin Platt who was 20 years older than her. Although she was 16 at the start of the relationship she was still in year 11 and therefore a schoolgirl. Tommy was furious and gave her a hard time so she moved in with Martin and lived with him for nearly two years. Katy wanted to test Martin's commitment to her so she deliberately got pregnant. Although Martin was initially annoyed by this he decided that he wanted to marry Katy and got an engagement ring for her and booked a romantic holiday for them so that when they were in the Lake District he could propose to her. Sadly this did not happen because Martin enlisted the help of Sally to do this. He was so pleased with Sally that he embraced her. Tommy saw this and well ... you know the rest.

If Tommy had apologised to Katy and acknowledged her feelings instead of brushing them to one side and accusing her of making a silly fuss over nothing (her termination and relationship breakdown) then he would never have been killed and Katy would never have killed herself.

I apologise for the length of this story but do you feel that beyond the age of 16 (compulsory education) 16+ children should have a say in what they believe to be right for them or should parents still steer them down a path of their (the parent's choosing) and expect them to obey to the letter?

What do you think? :confused:

Yours truly

jstevens1

[Siobhan]

Parents always think they know what is best for their children. Most parent who missed out on college will try to get their children to go, it is called living by proxy...

Alot of women/men who have children early and have to adjust to take care of them will blame that child for them missing out and will do anything to get their kids not to make the same mistake

In the corrie case, Tommy was just too pig headed and refused to believe that Katy would not make it to college and get a good job etc... He was her dad and what he said goes.. some people are like that

[Bad Wolf]

my mum never made it to university, she had me at a young age (20 was young then). i wanted to go to university for a number of reasons not just because my mum wanted it, too be honest she wouldn't of cared what i did, she just wanted me to be happy. she has never felt that anything was taken away from her, she got a job when she was 16 and has never looked back,

i wanted university becasue it would make my mum and grandparents proud, i liked the subject, it was a change of scene (staying in al small town in the north wasn't for me), also havent seen my dad since i was 11 so in part wanted to show the whole world how far i could get without his money and support (sort of like sticking two fingers up at him) and i thought it could be a lot of fun, sort of like one big adventure.

i loved my time at university so much i decided to stick around for another year and do my masters, loads of people have a degree now-a-days, and my grandad in particular was so proud on graduation day, i would love to see that again, plus i have finally decided what i would like to do with my life and a MA in Diplomatic Studies would be a big help. not bad for a girl from a small town up north

my point is, your parents will love you no matter what you decide to do, you may dissapoint them on occasion, but they will always love you- its part of the job description, to a large degree you have to live your life for you, not for them, my mum asks me all the time when i'm coming home, and i'm just not ready yet,
:cheer:

[Trinity]

Government targets are now that 50% of kids should go to Uni.

Lots of jobs that previously didn't need a degree now do, nursing is the most obvious example, and there are lots and lots of subjects that you can study that previously were not available.

Uni can be a stepping stone to the rest of your life, but it isn't for everyone. Look at people like Richard Branston and Alan Sugar, neither of them went to Uni but they both succeeded in a way that most people can only dream of.

Jobs like joinery and plumbing are very well paid now, mainly because of shortages because so many people are pushed into Uni. The country needs all sorts.

I enjoyed Uni as a student so much that now, 20 years later I still work in academia. But all around me I see kids not doing as well as they could because their heart isn't in it. Do a subject because you love it, enjoy your studies, and if you would rather work with you hands, do that!

Don't forget that a degree in any subject can help you get into some jobs, civil service and management training are examples. You are better to do some thing you love and get a good degree than to do something that you think will get you a job, hate it, and get a crap degree.

Life is too short to live it for other people, and like Rach says your parents will love you whatever you do.

[barneysulk]

And the winner of this years most boring thread goes to.........

[Jade]

And the winner of this years most boring thread goes to.........

If you find it boring dont read it, certinaly dont post on it!

[barneysulk]

If you find it boring dont read it, certinaly dont post on it!
Sorry! Didn't mean to be facetious, didn't go to University myself (or even school that much!).

[Jade]

I didnt go to university, the main reason was that I did really well in my A-Levels but didnt feel that I could dedicate three more years of my life to studing, I didnt have a clue what I wanted to do either.

At the moment I have a fairly well paid job that I enjoy, but I also have a house and a nice lifestyle and have been on some nice holidays with no debts, alot of people who I work with are in debts up to their eyballs with no chance of getting on the property ladder in the next 5 years, but I really think it is up to the indvidual. The way I look at it is I can always go to University at some other point in my life, but would miss out on the student lifestyle first time away from home, which for some people its what makes the university route worth while.

Anyway I hope that makes sense!

[SoapWatcher]

Dear Mordor & Co.

Tommy + Angela Harris thought so and it led to tragedy.

It can be so easy as parents to put their own aspirations before their children's feelings. i.e. they push their children into career moves which may be of the parent's choice and not that of their young adolescent. Here is a brief background ...
Angela + Tommy had to get married because Angie was expecting Katy. The couple were very young and had to give up their hopes + dreams of going to University. Katy turned out to be very intelligent and was keeping on top of her schoolwork before the family had to leave their home town, changing their names etc.. They therefore had aspirations for Katy to get good GCSEs then A'levels, then go on to University, have a high-flying career, get married, grandchildren .... all in that order. Katy, however, felt under a lot of pressure, she missed schooling and failed her GCSEs and had to resit them. She also had diabetes and fell in love with the male nurse that was treating her - Martin Platt who was 20 years older than her. Although she was 16 at the start of the relationship she was still in year 11 and therefore a schoolgirl. Tommy was furious and gave her a hard time so she moved in with Martin and lived with him for nearly two years. Katy wanted to test Martin's commitment to her so she deliberately got pregnant. Although Martin was initially annoyed by this he decided that he wanted to marry Katy and got an engagement ring for her and booked a romantic holiday for them so that when they were in the Lake District he could propose to her. Sadly this did not happen because Martin enlisted the help of Sally to do this. He was so pleased with Sally that he embraced her. Tommy saw this and well ... you know the rest.

If Tommy had apologised to Katy and acknowledged her feelings instead of brushing them to one side and accusing her of making a silly fuss over nothing (her termination and relationship breakdown) then he would never have been killed and Katy would never have killed herself.

I apologise for the length of this story but do you feel that beyond the age of 16 (compulsory education) 16+ children should have a say in what they believe to be right for them or should parents still steer them down a path of their (the parent's choosing) and expect them to obey to the letter?

What do you think? :confused:

Yours truly

jstevens1


No no no!!!!! She passed her GCSEs well!!! She failed her AS levels!!!!!!

[SoapWatcher]

If I had the choice again, I would have done an Open University degree, and done it in my own time. I didn't pick my degree very well, had so many problems. Surprisingly though I am not in a lot of debt like other people. Obviously I have student loans to pay off, but they aren't like a proper debt. However this year I have no support at all, and money is tight, and me and my fiance do spend a lot with little money, but we manage. I suppose its all part of learning to live by yourself, you make mistakes in budgeting but eventually you learn.

[RealityGap]

It does seem in Soap Land that going to Uni is the biggest deal for parents, wasn't Ilene distraught when Todd didn't go and shacked up with Sarah-Lou instead. Personally I think as long as my kids are happy then it doesn't matter what they do with their careers