chance
28-09-2005, 20:11
If using a touch-tone phone, press random numbers while ordering. Ask the person taking the order to stop doing that.
¤Tell the order taker that a rival pizza joint is on line two-and you're going with the lowest bidder.
¤Ask for the crust on top this time.
¤Don't just name the toppings of your choice. S-P-E-L-L them out. Slowly.
¤Say, "Hello." And then act stunned for five seconds. Behave as if the pizza person called you.
¤Ask if you get to keep the box. When they say, "Yes," give a huge sigh of relief.
¤Tell them to double-check to make sure your pizza is, in fact, dead.
¤When you call, tell the pizza guy that you need to see a menu.
¤Order two toppings, then say, "Oh no! They'll start fighting, I better stick to just one."
¤Ask if the pizza is organically grown.
¤When he/she repeats your order say, "Again, with a little more OOOOMPH! this time."
¤Start the conversation by reciting today's date and saying, "This may be my last entry."
¤Terminate the call with, "Remember, we never had this conversation."
¤Use these bonus words in the conversation: ROBUST, FREE-SPIRITED, COST-EFFICIENT, UKRAINIAN, and PUCE.
¤Sing the order to the tune of your favorite song from Metallica.
¤Put an extra edge in your voice when you say "crazy bread."
¤Tell the order taker you're a little bummed out. Get him/her to cheer you up.
¤Change your accent every three seconds.
¤Order 52 pepperoni slices prepared in a fractal pattern as follows from an equation you are about to dictate. Ask if they need paper.
¤Start your order with "I'd like" A little later, slap yourself and say,"No, I don't."
¤Put the accent on the last syllable of "pepperoni." Use the long "i" sound.
¤Move the mouthpiece farther and farther from your lips as you speak. When the call ends, jerk the mouthpiece back into place and scream GOODBYE at the top of your lungs.
¤Eliminate verbs from your speech.
¤Ask for the guy who took your order last time.
¤If he/she suggests anything, adamantly declare, "I shall not be swayed by your sweet words."
¤Start the conversation with "My Call to Pizza Place, Take 1, and-action!"
¤After ordering, say, "I wonder what THIS button on the phone does." Simulate a cutoff.
¤Say, "Kssssssssssssht," rather loudly into the phone. Ask if they felt that.
¤Learn to play a blues riff on the harmonica. Stop talking at regular intervals to play it.
¤Put him or her on hold.
¤Tell the order taker that a rival pizza joint is on line two-and you're going with the lowest bidder.
¤Ask for the crust on top this time.
¤Don't just name the toppings of your choice. S-P-E-L-L them out. Slowly.
¤Say, "Hello." And then act stunned for five seconds. Behave as if the pizza person called you.
¤Ask if you get to keep the box. When they say, "Yes," give a huge sigh of relief.
¤Tell them to double-check to make sure your pizza is, in fact, dead.
¤When you call, tell the pizza guy that you need to see a menu.
¤Order two toppings, then say, "Oh no! They'll start fighting, I better stick to just one."
¤Ask if the pizza is organically grown.
¤When he/she repeats your order say, "Again, with a little more OOOOMPH! this time."
¤Start the conversation by reciting today's date and saying, "This may be my last entry."
¤Terminate the call with, "Remember, we never had this conversation."
¤Use these bonus words in the conversation: ROBUST, FREE-SPIRITED, COST-EFFICIENT, UKRAINIAN, and PUCE.
¤Sing the order to the tune of your favorite song from Metallica.
¤Put an extra edge in your voice when you say "crazy bread."
¤Tell the order taker you're a little bummed out. Get him/her to cheer you up.
¤Change your accent every three seconds.
¤Order 52 pepperoni slices prepared in a fractal pattern as follows from an equation you are about to dictate. Ask if they need paper.
¤Start your order with "I'd like" A little later, slap yourself and say,"No, I don't."
¤Put the accent on the last syllable of "pepperoni." Use the long "i" sound.
¤Move the mouthpiece farther and farther from your lips as you speak. When the call ends, jerk the mouthpiece back into place and scream GOODBYE at the top of your lungs.
¤Eliminate verbs from your speech.
¤Ask for the guy who took your order last time.
¤If he/she suggests anything, adamantly declare, "I shall not be swayed by your sweet words."
¤Start the conversation with "My Call to Pizza Place, Take 1, and-action!"
¤After ordering, say, "I wonder what THIS button on the phone does." Simulate a cutoff.
¤Say, "Kssssssssssssht," rather loudly into the phone. Ask if they felt that.
¤Learn to play a blues riff on the harmonica. Stop talking at regular intervals to play it.
¤Put him or her on hold.