Luna
09-08-2005, 14:15
The HMs were in the spa after dinner with their house guest to chat about living in the BB house when an uncharacteristically awkward Vensa told Nadia she had a question to ask her. "I have to ask you something, and it probably has no relevancy to anything...."
"I think she is talking about your sexuality," Tim said, trying to help Vensa escape her awkwardness.
"Yes, I'm talking about your sexuality,' Vesna confirmed before continuing curiously. "And you may leave this house thinking I am a bitch or whatever, but I am not."
"No she won't," Tim assured, but this only cause Vensa to shout Tim down for butting in, as Nadia sat coyly, seemingly aware of the question about to be asked of her.
Having dealt with Tim's interuption, Vesna continued. "We have been thinking, and most of all, I have been thinking heaps about it.... You are a very sexual person, and we have now discovered that you have implants..."
"Fifty percent of women in our population have implants... well at least a high percentage," Nadia retorted before telling Vesna to "go on."
There was then an awkward silence before Greg blurted out what Vesna seemed incapable of asking. "Are you trannsexual? That's what they are asking."
"That's a word I am not comfortable with," responded Nadia.
"OK, were you [a girl] when you came out of the womb?" said Vesna.
"Err... No, I wasn't," replied Nadia.
"OK, thankyou. And I am very comfortable with that and I am glad you have said it. Now that we have established that, we can move on."
Nadia though, wasn't ready to move on. She told the group she was insulted that they would need to ask her about her gender when she hadn't queried whether any of them were gay, or bisexual. "What do you see when you look at me?"
"I'm confused," admitted Vesna. "I want to clear up the confusion and now I've cleared it up and now I'm at peace. We've been in here for one reason and I believe it's an honesty type of thing. If you ask me a question about something I'm prepared to tell you the truth. I've asked you one question and I want to know the truth about it. You're confident with it, your comfortable and I accept it and we move on. That's it and I don't care anymore."
"I do care," said Nadia. "It kind of jeopardises the whole person that I am. Have I insulted you in any way? What's the relevance of that question then? Do you need to categorise or have a tag attached to a forehead to be able to accept people? You need a box to tick?"
Vesna tried to explain that she was just curious about it. "Instead of talking to you now and thinking about it I want to get that out of my head ..."
"I do appreciate your honesty and your balls and your courage in asking that ... I just can't see that it's necessary to ask that question when you meet people," said Nadia.
Tim finally jumped in and put his foot in it big time. "You might congratulate Nadia for having the balls as you put it..." he said, then realising his unfortunate slip, started his sentence again. "You might congratulate Vesna for having the balls, but I don't see how you can congratulate her for having the balls and at the same time be annoyed at the question. Any suspicions about your sexuality or your history and past are feelings and things that we will have, that's just part of being a human being and noticing things."
Tim explained that Vesna felt she needed to know and he was uncomfortable that she felt the need to ask the question. He would prefer that Nadia told them in her own time.
"I would never talk to you about it because I don't see the relevance or the need" replied Nadia. "When it's a medical condition and you have a problem it's not a life choice, it's a medical choice. And I think people need to know that. I don't want to talk about it or even be reminded of it," Nadia said.
"I went in the house [in the UK] and I did not tell them whatsoever and they did not realise at all and I find that I am insulted in a way and quite disappointed that after a few hours you thought that immediately."
In tears she said to the HMs: "When do you stop being categorised under that name and start being seen as a woman? A normal, single, independent woman with a normal day-to-day life? I would like to know."
Later in the diary room Nadia told BB she had been upset by the question. "I feel quite strong about it. It's not an issue in my life. It just seems to be a curiosity. I was a little bit upset and I think through that I have become closer to them as a group."
She said she was mainly disappointed in herself: "It makes me question what physically is wrong with me that I can be identified like that. I was just disappointed because I also feel I have to do better and try harder to fit in as a normal person."
"I think she is talking about your sexuality," Tim said, trying to help Vensa escape her awkwardness.
"Yes, I'm talking about your sexuality,' Vesna confirmed before continuing curiously. "And you may leave this house thinking I am a bitch or whatever, but I am not."
"No she won't," Tim assured, but this only cause Vensa to shout Tim down for butting in, as Nadia sat coyly, seemingly aware of the question about to be asked of her.
Having dealt with Tim's interuption, Vesna continued. "We have been thinking, and most of all, I have been thinking heaps about it.... You are a very sexual person, and we have now discovered that you have implants..."
"Fifty percent of women in our population have implants... well at least a high percentage," Nadia retorted before telling Vesna to "go on."
There was then an awkward silence before Greg blurted out what Vesna seemed incapable of asking. "Are you trannsexual? That's what they are asking."
"That's a word I am not comfortable with," responded Nadia.
"OK, were you [a girl] when you came out of the womb?" said Vesna.
"Err... No, I wasn't," replied Nadia.
"OK, thankyou. And I am very comfortable with that and I am glad you have said it. Now that we have established that, we can move on."
Nadia though, wasn't ready to move on. She told the group she was insulted that they would need to ask her about her gender when she hadn't queried whether any of them were gay, or bisexual. "What do you see when you look at me?"
"I'm confused," admitted Vesna. "I want to clear up the confusion and now I've cleared it up and now I'm at peace. We've been in here for one reason and I believe it's an honesty type of thing. If you ask me a question about something I'm prepared to tell you the truth. I've asked you one question and I want to know the truth about it. You're confident with it, your comfortable and I accept it and we move on. That's it and I don't care anymore."
"I do care," said Nadia. "It kind of jeopardises the whole person that I am. Have I insulted you in any way? What's the relevance of that question then? Do you need to categorise or have a tag attached to a forehead to be able to accept people? You need a box to tick?"
Vesna tried to explain that she was just curious about it. "Instead of talking to you now and thinking about it I want to get that out of my head ..."
"I do appreciate your honesty and your balls and your courage in asking that ... I just can't see that it's necessary to ask that question when you meet people," said Nadia.
Tim finally jumped in and put his foot in it big time. "You might congratulate Nadia for having the balls as you put it..." he said, then realising his unfortunate slip, started his sentence again. "You might congratulate Vesna for having the balls, but I don't see how you can congratulate her for having the balls and at the same time be annoyed at the question. Any suspicions about your sexuality or your history and past are feelings and things that we will have, that's just part of being a human being and noticing things."
Tim explained that Vesna felt she needed to know and he was uncomfortable that she felt the need to ask the question. He would prefer that Nadia told them in her own time.
"I would never talk to you about it because I don't see the relevance or the need" replied Nadia. "When it's a medical condition and you have a problem it's not a life choice, it's a medical choice. And I think people need to know that. I don't want to talk about it or even be reminded of it," Nadia said.
"I went in the house [in the UK] and I did not tell them whatsoever and they did not realise at all and I find that I am insulted in a way and quite disappointed that after a few hours you thought that immediately."
In tears she said to the HMs: "When do you stop being categorised under that name and start being seen as a woman? A normal, single, independent woman with a normal day-to-day life? I would like to know."
Later in the diary room Nadia told BB she had been upset by the question. "I feel quite strong about it. It's not an issue in my life. It just seems to be a curiosity. I was a little bit upset and I think through that I have become closer to them as a group."
She said she was mainly disappointed in herself: "It makes me question what physically is wrong with me that I can be identified like that. I was just disappointed because I also feel I have to do better and try harder to fit in as a normal person."