chance
29-07-2005, 11:34
As usual, Derek woke early this morning and attempted to set about his cleaning. Big Brother, however, hadn't delivered the vacuum cleaner.
Talking to himself, he moaned: "I'm getting frustrated not having a vacuum cleaner - my skin's so dry.
Seemingly frustrated by the lack of electrical cleaning equipment, he broke out into a monologue-style moan about society in general: "Intimidating people into thinking thoughts that they do not think. What you have now is basically the suppression of people's natural instincts. It's a good thing people suppress instincts that are racist or sexist... [we live in] the oldest democratic nation in the world and one of the most civilised nations in the world and that is that."
He continued: "But when it comes to bantering, joke-making, when a thing is said in jest, it should be taken in jest. You should be able to feel you can laugh at it... It's ludicrous, it's so, so ludicrous."
"I would like the vacuum cleaner," the Tory insisted. "I'd so, so like the vacuum cleaner. Dear oh dear, it's so annoying."
Deciding on an alternative approach to his morning chores, he opted to use a sweeping brush instead: "I'll do it like this - there's always a way to defeat Big Brother."
Not realising Eugene had woken whilst he was in the Diary Room, Derek pondered over who switched the kettle on: "I'm quite sure I didn't do that - maybe I did..."
Eugene emerged from the garden and the pair commenced cleaning as the eviction day bell started to toll.
Eugene suggested: "You know what they've done, they've forgotten to change the bloody thing [vacuum cleaner] up, that's what."
(ds)
Talking to himself, he moaned: "I'm getting frustrated not having a vacuum cleaner - my skin's so dry.
Seemingly frustrated by the lack of electrical cleaning equipment, he broke out into a monologue-style moan about society in general: "Intimidating people into thinking thoughts that they do not think. What you have now is basically the suppression of people's natural instincts. It's a good thing people suppress instincts that are racist or sexist... [we live in] the oldest democratic nation in the world and one of the most civilised nations in the world and that is that."
He continued: "But when it comes to bantering, joke-making, when a thing is said in jest, it should be taken in jest. You should be able to feel you can laugh at it... It's ludicrous, it's so, so ludicrous."
"I would like the vacuum cleaner," the Tory insisted. "I'd so, so like the vacuum cleaner. Dear oh dear, it's so annoying."
Deciding on an alternative approach to his morning chores, he opted to use a sweeping brush instead: "I'll do it like this - there's always a way to defeat Big Brother."
Not realising Eugene had woken whilst he was in the Diary Room, Derek pondered over who switched the kettle on: "I'm quite sure I didn't do that - maybe I did..."
Eugene emerged from the garden and the pair commenced cleaning as the eviction day bell started to toll.
Eugene suggested: "You know what they've done, they've forgotten to change the bloody thing [vacuum cleaner] up, that's what."
(ds)