chance
19-06-2005, 12:20
A disappointed Maxwell went to the Diary Room to sulk about his lack of progress with Saskia, but Big Brother had a few problems translating his Cockney slang.
During the cider-filled evening, Maxwell moved in on his prey, taking Saskia up to the loft to make his final move.
But just when he had her where he wanted her, Saskia gave him the cold shoulder and the Gooner then fell asleep before he could change her mind.
"How smooth am I?" grumbled Maxwell. "Put the bite on and woke up 10 minutes ago doing ******* all. Absolute pony."
Big Brother didn't quite understand Maxwell's drift and asked him to explain 'putting the bite on'. "Sticking it on her," clarified the footie fan impatiently.
Moping Maxwell whined that he had been angling to get Saskia up to the loft to relive their romantic rendezvous on the speed dating night. "I didn't take her up there for a game of cards," he pointed out. But in the end he just "got a custard pie".
"A custard pie?" queried Big Brother, wondering what was so bad about receiving pastry treats. "Yeah, I got a splat," he confirmed.
Establishing that he meant Saskia had spurned his advances, Big Brother wondered how Maxwell was feeling on reflection.
"Covered in custard," replied miserable Maxwell.
Which is a bad thing apparently.
During the cider-filled evening, Maxwell moved in on his prey, taking Saskia up to the loft to make his final move.
But just when he had her where he wanted her, Saskia gave him the cold shoulder and the Gooner then fell asleep before he could change her mind.
"How smooth am I?" grumbled Maxwell. "Put the bite on and woke up 10 minutes ago doing ******* all. Absolute pony."
Big Brother didn't quite understand Maxwell's drift and asked him to explain 'putting the bite on'. "Sticking it on her," clarified the footie fan impatiently.
Moping Maxwell whined that he had been angling to get Saskia up to the loft to relive their romantic rendezvous on the speed dating night. "I didn't take her up there for a game of cards," he pointed out. But in the end he just "got a custard pie".
"A custard pie?" queried Big Brother, wondering what was so bad about receiving pastry treats. "Yeah, I got a splat," he confirmed.
Establishing that he meant Saskia had spurned his advances, Big Brother wondered how Maxwell was feeling on reflection.
"Covered in custard," replied miserable Maxwell.
Which is a bad thing apparently.