View Full Version : Housework!!
My boyfriend refuses to do any houework and i'm losing my sanity, we have three bedroom house and both work full time, admittedly he works longer hours and does a manual job. I've tried leaving things in a state but he really does not notice!! he'd live in squlor if he had it his way!! but how can I make him do it he claimms its always tidy when he's a home and that we have a magic cleaning fairy!!. He does DIY though, which has included some major renevations latley but his idea of cooking tea is getting a take-a-way!!!
Anyway any tips for getting him to shift his lazy ass would be helpfull!!
It is a hard one, I remember when I moved in with my husband before we got married and he used to drive me mad. My family had always tidied up behind them in the kitchen straight away and he would quite happily leave dishes over night in the sink. I always ended up doing them.
now my strategy is:
dishes - dishwasher (but mine has broken down this week!!!)
cleaning - cleaner
ironing - ironing lady, but before that I stopped doing his shirts. unfortunately he would rather buy new ones than iron !
cooking - I do it, if I don't then it is take away or eating out
shopping - I do it
garden - he does it
DIY - get someone in, they will do a better job than my husband!
I know that I sound rather lazy, but I was going mental, I work 5 days a week, I have 2 kids and loads of activities to take them to. He works long hours, and travels abroad at least 1 week out of 4, plus a few days here and there and when he is here he plays golf..
Have toyed with the idea of getting a cleaner but the house is in such a mess at the moment and the only room that is complete is the kitchen!!. Also I think we both come from family that have traditional male and female roles, although his mum is superwomen, she a headteacher and has a property management business and her house is immaculate all the time!!He is good at DIY though which is a pluss!
It makes a big difference to me.
My husbunds mother was a stay at home mum who did everything for her kids. The boys never lfted a finger. She has really made a rod for her 4 daughters= in-law backs!
My mother worked full time as a nursing manager, and she ended up with a nervous breakdown. she has always said to me that life is too short, if you can afford the help then get it. anything to make life a bit easier. And there are more important things to argue about other than housework!
You bunch of snobs :p I wish I could just get a cleaner. Come to think of it I probably could but I'd have an issue with privacy.
Anyways as for housework. I don't do any so nothing gets done. I only do it when it gets really bad. Atm there's dog and cat poo everywhere and dog sick and it's been there for 4 days but it's only on about 7/10 in terms of being bad at the mo so when it gets to 10/10 I'll start to have a whip round.
di marco
18-06-2005, 17:38
Atm there's dog and cat poo everywhere and dog sick and it's been there for 4 days but it's only on about 7/10 in terms of being bad at the mo so when it gets to 10/10 I'll start to have a whip round.
you are joking, right?
You bunch of snobs I wish I could just get a cleaner. Come to think of it I probably could but I'd have an issue with privacy.
Yea I have issues with that as well.
Hope the rest is a joke!!
No, I have lots of cats and dogs so they just poo everywhere lol.
4 dogs, and 14 cats. Nightmare!!!!
I don't do any cleaning though till it gets really bad and it's not in a bad condition atm.
There is no snob issue with getting a cleaner. I ended up with CFS trying to run this house and a job and my family. Now I only do what I have to, there is no point in being a marter to housework if you don't have too..
The first time I got a cleaner I worried about privacy etc. Now I don't care.
I don't have any pets due to allergies, but even if my son wasn't allergic I wouldn't have cats - they terrify me!
I could never have my privacy compromised. They root through your draws and everything, I've seen them on this hidden camera show.
I couldn't care less! I am sure that my cleaner doesn't though.. She has got better thing to do I am sure.
Some people don't have a problem rifling through their belongings but it would drive me mental. It would take a few months for me to trust them on their own before that I would be following them around like crazy.
Once every six months I have the man round with the carpet upholsterer machine from the Yellow Pages to come and shampoo me carpets and I even follow him around!
It is easier just to give them a key. They clean when you are out, and you come home from work to a clean house.
You have to make sure that everything is tidy, though, so that she can clean. No stuff lying around. It gives me an incentive to tidy up, lol.
Before I got a cleaner I was the only one who cleaned the bathrooms (and we have 3) and the only one who washed floors etc. It makes a big difference to me and I don't get mad about my hubby doing nothing anymore!
It is easier just to give them a key. They clean when you are out, and you come home from work to a clean house.
You have to make sure that everything is tidy, though, so that she can clean. No stuff lying around. It gives me an incentive to tidy up, lol.
Before I got a cleaner I was the only one who cleaned the bathrooms (and we have 3) and the only one who washed floors etc. It makes a big difference to me and I don't get mad about my hubby doing nothing anymore!
I suppose putting things away would help and that way they have no need to open draws and things.
No, I have lots of cats and dogs so they just poo everywhere lol.
4 dogs, and 14 cats. Nightmare!!!!
I don't do any cleaning though till it gets really bad and it's not in a bad condition atm.
what about your klids though? bit germy isnt it? your house must just stink of ****!
what about your klids though? bit germy isnt it? your house must just stink of ****!
They can't get into the area where I keep them.
Normally it's the kitchen because I've got tiles down in there so if they have a poo I can clean it up easier.
di marco
18-06-2005, 21:34
They can't get into the area where I keep them.
Normally it's the kitchen because I've got tiles down in there so if they have a poo I can clean it up easier.
what they do it on the floor? you dont have a tray/newspaper they can do it in/on?
Nah, there's too many to housetrain. My great Dane is lovely, she's housetrained though.
uirgh i couldnt have dog poo lying around for days an hour would be bad enough!
i would love a cleaner but you still have to tidy up so i might as well do it myself anyway no one does it as good as me!! dave (my hubbie) is really good when it comes to housework he will do the kitchen and tidy but i do the cleaning of the rest of the flat! i dont complian though he offwork at the mo and has cooked every night for me!! i hate cooking and he loves it so i just let him get on an dod it!!
my other half is excellent,very house proud,he does as much tidying up as me if not more.
my other half is excellent,very house proud,he does as much tidying up as me if not more.
Lucky you! I can't stand doing it to be honest. I'm so lazy. Going to work is enough for me and I still think I should be paid for getting up in the morning :D
my other half is excellent,very house proud,he does as much tidying up as me if not more.
You are very lucky!
But then you are pregnant, and you have small kids, so he should do his share..
If my husband was here, you can guarantee he wouldn't do any either. Occasionally my mam pops round but she gets so fustrated with it.
$sTaCeY$
19-06-2005, 19:14
im only 13 and i tidy most of the house myself!
Nightmare tiding up after my little sisters mess!!
im only 13 and i tidy most of the house myself!
Nightmare tiding up after my little sisters mess!!
My little girl likes to attempt to hoover but she can't push the dyson lol. She's so cute.
$sTaCeY$
19-06-2005, 19:30
My little girl likes to attempt to hoover but she can't push the dyson lol. She's so cute.
awww cute how old is she
She's 4, she'll be 5 soon. The time flies!
Nah, there's too many to housetrain. My great Dane is lovely, she's housetrained though.
well if what your saying is true im disquisted and suprised you havent been evicted from where you live and how un hygenic i wouldnt allow anyone let alone children within 10miles of your house
well if what your saying is true im disquisted and suprised you havent been evicted from where you live and how un hygenic i wouldnt allow anyone let alone children within 10miles of your house
:eek: I own this house sweetheart (well almost, mortgaged), they can't evict me :D
Anyways I don't let the kids near it, they only poo in the kitchen and that's closed off to the kids. I've got 3 floors in my house and the kitchens on the middle floor. The kids don't really go up there.
hmnmm only in the kitchen well i guess thats alright then coz thats only where you prepare food obviously not that important all the cats crawling over the worktops disqgusting
I dont do housework...hate the stuff.
Can i ask a quick question? How many people actually iron their clothes before they hang them up or put them in a drawer? I never see the point cause you'll just have to iron them again. This drives my mother mad
Iron on demand!! get be bothered to do it all in one go
Iron on demand!! get be bothered to do it all in one go
Me too! :)
hmnmm only in the kitchen well i guess thats alright then coz thats only where you prepare food obviously not that important all the cats crawling over the worktops disqgusting
If I'm going to cook in there I clean it but that's the thing nobody uses it at the moment. Maybe when the kids are older, it will get more use. At the moment we've got a microwave, oven, kettle and fridge/freezer in a room downstairs and that does us. We don't need the kitchen at the moment so it's just a big room where I keep my dogs.
well i guess if noone uses it it ok but i still wouldnt leave it for more than a few hours dont it smaell??
Not really because we're mostly downstairs or on the top floor. We have a smaller kitchen downstairs and there's only 3 of us.
I do clean it though when it needs done badly.
I am really not that keen on animals in the house. My youngest would love a pet, but he is allergic, so I have an excuse. You are really not selling me on animalsl WQ!
I am really not that keen on animals in the house. My youngest would love a pet, but he is allergic, so I have an excuse. You are really not selling me on animalsl WQ!
LOL, I only live on 2 floors. It may surprise you but I NEVER spend anytime in the lounge whatsoever. I'm always in the study. If I want to go and watch a bit of tele I have a mini living room thing on the bottom floor as well.
SoapRach
21-06-2005, 12:45
My boyfriend is quite good at tidying the house but not cleaning - the most frustrating thing is that he sees this as him doing his bit.. I do all the ironing in one go cos I find it takes less time - if i don't iron he wears crumpled clothes. He cooks now and then but always turns it into a big deal so it;s easier to do it myself.
Don't you think that men have that act down to an art. They make such a fuss that you do it yourself!
That is why I have a cleaner and an ironing lady. If he won't do it why should I? I have a busy life, busy, stressful work and busy kids. I cannot do everything, and if he won't... then he can pay for someone to do it!
I do decorating and DIY so I don't do so bad.
Don't you think that men have that act down to an art. They make such a fuss that you do it yourself!
That is why I have a cleaner and an ironing lady. If he won't do it why should I? I have a busy life, busy, stressful work and busy kids. I cannot do everything, and if he won't... then he can pay for someone to do it!
I would have loved an ironing lady when I used to have mountains of ironing but now I only iron when I need to do something.
I would have loved an ironing lady when I used to have mountains of ironing but now I only iron when I need to do something.I have to say, I have never stood in the kitchen/front room or anywhere really doing a pile of ironing. If something will need ironing, it gets done when its needed as the way my hubby chucks his stuff in the wardrobe, there is absolutely no point!! But I can never remember my mum doing it either so maybe its what you are exposed to. I'd love a cleaner - my hubby never picks up a duster/hoover, he just moans !! :rotfl:
Thanks to my heavy spending habits I can barely afford to live as it is without the luxury of a cleaner!
Thanks to my heavy spending habits I can barely afford to live as it is without the luxury of a cleaner!I know that feeling. Especially with the number of clothes I am having to buy at the mo thanks to my eldest having mad growth spurts at mo.....
I know, I'll get him to help :rotfl: :rotfl:
Talking about growth spurts
I feel sorry for my sister her eldest is really small for his age (he's coming on 30) and is just under 5ft (do you realise how hard it is to buy clothes for men that height) and her youngest (who's just turned 21) is going on 6ft 5" and a size 14 feet they need to get nearly everything specially made for him
I feel sorry for my sister her elsest is really small for his age (he's coming on 30) and is just under 5ft (do you realise how hard it is to buy clothes for men that height) and her youngest (who's just turned 21) is going on 6ft 5" and a size 14 feet they need to get nearly everything specially made for himI'm concerned my eldest is going to be like your sisters youngest......he's already in a size 5 (same as me) and is nearing 5ft yet he is only 11. Every month he is growing a good inch. No idea what I'll do about his clothing then. Its a disposable world!!! (Shame the prices don't match)
My main problem with housework is that the youngest hates the hoover, so I have to wait till he is out of the room to do it, and all I can then hear is him screaming in the background cause he is scared - bless
aaawww thats a shame...when i was younger my mum couldn't put on the washing machine until i was fast asleep because i was scared of that whirling sound it makes
Mine leans against it when its on spin cycle!!!!!
I'm concerned my eldest is going to be like your sisters youngest......he's already in a size 5 (same as me) and is nearing 5ft yet he is only 11. Every month he is growing a good inch. No idea what I'll do about his clothing then. Its a disposable world!!! (Shame the prices don't match)
Too bad we couldn't stop them growing for a while i'm only a year old than my nephew and i'm only 5ft so it looks really stupid when we're together and he calls me aunt......i have to crane my neck to see him lol
Too bad we couldn't stop them growing for a while i'm only a year old than my nephew and i'm only 5ft so it looks really stupid when we're together and he calls me aunt......i have to crane my neck to see him lolYep, I'm 5ft 4 so feel very intimidated when walking past the local high school at kick out time!!!!
They grow so big so fast. They seem to get bigger everyday. My son almost comes up to my waist and he's only 6 mind you that's probably normal!
You are very lucky!
But then you are pregnant, and you have small kids, so he should do his share..
he does more then his fair share,he did this even before i was pregant and only had the one kid.hes just very tidy and house proud,if he goes to his mums and sees some mess hel tidy it up or hoover for her.
They grow so big so fast. They seem to get bigger everyday. My son almost comes up to my waist and he's only 6 mind you that's probably normal!
mine is 6 in august and hes near to up to me boobs! hes tall for his age!
he does more then his fair share,he did this even before i was pregnant and only had the one kid.hes just very tidy and house proud,if he goes to his mums and sees some mess he'l tidy it up or hoover for her.i can hoover and he'l redo it claiming i havent done it properly so now i sdont bother at all wit hthe hoovering,he does it every day ,up and down..
mine is 6 in august and hes near to up to me boobs! hes tall for his age!
oh and just thuoght id add that im not short either,5ft 8
My son must be small then lol, mind you I have got long legs so a higher waist.
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