View Full Version : A big worry of mine at the moment...
Kirsty :]
30-04-2010, 11:08
Sorry about this, I have a kind of female worry.. I suppose.
I just don't know who to turn too, my friends have been great, but I just feel like, they've never really been in the situation so are just saying things to calm me down.
I am so ashamed of myself for getting into this trouble, but everyone makes mistakes right? Mine was a really big mistake, and I have sure as hell learnt from it. I don't even want to type it on here, as it is that silly and pathetic, I should know better, but here goes.
Monday night, I slept with a guy that I have become more friendly with lately. I took the protection, I made sure it was initiated before it went further, he said he put it on... caught up in the moment and afterwards, turns out he hadn't. In fact, he threw it behind the sofa and afterwards told me "it must've slipped off". I felt so violated, that he would do that to my body... felt like all my self respect had just gone out of the window.
I went for the morning after pill straight away the next morning, I'm due on sometime at the beginning of next week but last night and today I'm on.. well kind of, it's as if I'm at the end of my period.. I can't quite work out if that's normal? Or if something has gone wrong, and just wondered if anyone on here could help? I am sorry for the graphics!
I feel so ashamed of myself, but I know now, to check first, and to definately not go there if there is no protection, I hope everyone else does this too, as the worry it causes is definately not worth one night of stupidness, I promise you this!
Again, I'm sorry for the details, just don't know what else to do.
Kirsty, you are right to feel violated.. you took this procaution to protect you and he went ahead without your consent anyways... In my days (I sound old) I would always carry a condom and (again sorry for been graphic) but made sure I put it on myself.. that way I know it can't have "slipped off" or they couldn't be bothered.
I have never used a morning after pill so I can't tell if bleeding is natural. Don't beat yourself up over this. this is not your fault.. you were not to know what he would do
Kirsty :]
30-04-2010, 12:15
This sounds so stupid because at my age, I should know how to do this, but I don't actually know how to do them! The only other person I have been with is Adam, and he always took control of that part. I think practising with some bananas is on the cards, because I know that if it isn't put on properly, there is just as much risk of it breaking and causing problems, which is why I trusted him to do it himself. I definately think, after this.. that actually, schools do not do enough for Sex ed. I'm not blaming schools at all for this, I jsut think everyone should be taught how to put them on. I will never ever go there again, I have read up on it a bit this morning, and apparently this is quite normal, I will just wait now, and in 2 weeks will do a test, just to be on the safe side as this is also reccomended apparently.
I learnt from my ex but I was with him many many years before I could do it... I agree with you about sex ed... it is all well and good to tell you the pill with stop babies but only a condom will help stop diseases. Many men say they don't like using a condom, yet majority of them expect women to put chemicals into their bodies (the pill) just to let them off the hook.. I hope all goes well for you and keep practising... everyone makes mistakes and you obviously will learn from this
tammyy2j
30-04-2010, 12:33
We all make mistakes
Did you vomit at all after taking the morning after pill?
Kirsty :]
30-04-2010, 12:34
Noo I was fine, they said if I brought it back up within 2 hours then to go back, but I was okay.
Kirstey, can you phone a medical centre and ask about the bleeding, whether it can come from the morning after pill? That way you get proper advice and it will ease your worries, I hope. And that guy is a scumbag for doing that to you :angry:
Kirsty :]
30-04-2010, 15:06
I suppose I could do, but having no credit, and not being able to use the hous ephone with family being in the house is proving difficult... I shall try more research online, maybe there's some sort of NHS website?
I think most of it is my fault, I trust way too easily.. I must learn to keep my barrier up.
This is NOT your fault, Kirstey, it is the guy's fault who tricked you. But as Kath said, next make sure he has got the mac on :)
This is definitely not your fault Kirsty. You gave the guy the condom and he told you he'd put it on. It's completely his fault. Please don't feel ashamed of yourself - you did everything right.
You could ask a pharmacist if the bleeding is normal after taking the morning after pill. They'll be able to advise you further.
As for putting on condoms, I believe the main thing is to pinch the top part (the bit that looks like a nipple - not sure what it's really called :eek:) so that it doesn't fill with air when it's put on. Then roll it down.
Kirsty :]
30-04-2010, 17:24
Thankyou, reading up on it now, it can cause you to start your next period a week earlier/later, I was due on Monday/Tuesdayish anyways, and I'm pretty sure I'm on as it feels like someone is trying to steal my ovaries from me BIG time :( never felt this pain before, this could be down to the pill though.
;715552']Thankyou, reading up on it now, it can cause you to start your next period a week earlier/later, I was due on Monday/Tuesdayish anyways, and I'm pretty sure I'm on as it feels like someone is trying to steal my ovaries from me BIG time :( never felt this pain before, this could be down to the pill though.
I can empatise with you.. get yourself a hot water bottle, some chocolate and a weepy movie... best thing for you now.. feel better xxx
Kirsty :]
30-04-2010, 17:34
I have a hot water bottle, Top Gear, and am waiting on my Ben and Jerrys haha, I will take a test when I'm off though, purely to be on the safe side.
Thankyou so much everyone, I can't actually get over how great you've all been, a few of my school friends have had mixed views, think it tainted their views of me and the way I am, but I promise this was a one off, and I am not like that on purpose, and will NOT everrrrrr be making this mistake again, too much hassle than it's definately worth.
the morning after pill can make you come on a week early or late and it usually is heavier than normal. Thats what i found anyway, i hope that you are feeling better soon.
The guy seems a prat big style. Dont be ashamed its not your fault that he behaved in the manner that he did.
You wait until you meet somebody else who makes you go weak at the knees :D But I know you will make sure that a repeat will not happen. All the best xxx
Chloe O'brien
02-05-2010, 02:42
Kirsty don't feel any of this is your fault. You were very mature in having condoms it's the lying scumbag's fault. To put your mind at ease does your health centre have a family planning clinic you can pop into for advice. Put a pregnancy test in with the doctors it is free. I'm sending you a big hug xxxx
I think it can mess around with your cycle, I remember a flatmate of mine saying last year. That'll most likely be what the bleeding is.
I hope you're feeling better now, Kirsty :)
Kirsty :]
03-05-2010, 16:20
Thankyou everyone :) think it's all good now :) on the note of the guy however, he hasn't even spoke to me since and is avoiding me.. I love being used. :|
;715793']Thankyou everyone :) think it's all good now :) on the note of the guy however, he hasn't even spoke to me since and is avoiding me.. I love being used. :|
Know what Kirsty.. his loss!! You are a much better person that he will ever deserve!
;715793']Thankyou everyone :) think it's all good now :) on the note of the guy however, he hasn't even spoke to me since and is avoiding me.. I love being used. :|
He is a jerk, he is not worthy of you :)
he sounds an absolute idiot, glad that you are feeling better.
Chloe O'brien
03-05-2010, 23:43
Kirsty don't give the slimey toad another minute of your time. It's his loss not yours. He'll get his comeuppance one of these days. Hopefully he'll catch a bad dose of green willie one day that will teach him.
Kirsty :]
04-05-2010, 00:11
He's n abolute low life, I know this :/ I just really really thought that he genuinely liked me. Now both he and Adam don't speak to me anymore, it's a small pattern, just wish I knew what I was doing wrong :|
You have done NOTHING wrong, Kirstey, please stop thinking you have. None of this is your fault, it is the guys that have done wrong. Sadly we all meet people like that at some time in life, all part of life, but NOT your fault. I am sure the next guy you meet will treat you with the respect you deserve, they are not all like those two idiots xx :)
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