joint story by Angeldelight & Joel_Beckett_Lover

[Angeldelight]

Part One

Change is difficult but often essential to survival
~ Les Brown ~

Chrissie lay in bed and stared at the sun through the slightly ajar curtains. She could still smell him, he’d been gone 5 days, he’d phoned to say they were all right, that they were safe and still she could smell his scent on the bed they’d shared, before he’d ran away there was no other word for it. He’d run from a man who if found them would kill Danny, would kill them both as Jake wouldn’t allow Danny to come to any harm.

She sighed to herself and shifted her gaze to the ceiling. They’d gradually been getting somewhere, together. When she’d started to let him in, when she couldn’t hold out against him, when she wanted to be with him, and when finally he’d had to run and left her there thinking, wondering, what was he doing, would he ever be coming back, living with regrets seemed pointless, but couldn’t she just a little.

Chrissie stood behind the bar of the pub she owned, the pub she’d fought for and now ran with a chilling secret. ‘Secrets never stay secret for long’ she could hear her mother’s voice echo in her mind as she had countless times since the fatal night in February. She glanced over at the fruit machine, at the patch on the floor where she’d gotten down on her knees and mopped up her husbands blood. That was the night that had made her, that had and would always be there, in the back of her mind, that night, the night she’d killed her husband had made her who she was, who she would be for the rest of her life, a murderer, a betrayed woman who couldn’t take it any more. She’d vowed while dragging his body into the shallow grave, that she’d never, ever let herself be taken like that, she never put all her faith in man to have it thrown back at her, but hadn’t she done a similar thing with Jake, she wondered.

She’d let him in, she’d let her guard down and was herself with him, could be herself around him, she’d started to want, to believe that maybe just maybe, but in the end he’d chosen over her and he’d left. She’d wanted him to stay, stay with her here but he couldn’t, she understood that but she didn’t have to like it. Danny had been a blight on their relationship if you could call it that since the beginning, he’d talked her into a date to lunch ‘me and my flowers will just sit here if you don’t mind’. He’d made her laugh one thing she couldn’t hold out against, he’d made her feel special, he’d made her laugh and above all he made her feel safe.

Sharon- how you doing?
Chrissie smiled and pulled in her emotions, good yeah, nodding her head she looked around the pub, at Sharon and Dennis canoodling behind the bar, she wanted Jake, she missed him but she needed stay focused, he wasn’t the only one with secrets, with a life on the line.

[diamond1]

wicked so far cant wait to read joel beckett lovers bit but really good so far

[Rach33]

Part Two

While we are free to choose, once we have made those choices, we are tied to the consequences of those choices
~ Russell M. Nelson ~

Jake sat alone in the deserted park, leaning against an old and worn oak tree, he’d kicked off his shoes and allowed himself to feel the freedom of the fresh air and his un-claustrophobic surroundings
His thoughts drifted back to the shadow in his life right now, the shadow that ate away his thoughts and clouded his dreams, the shadow that changed his life, Chrissie Watts
He’d been gone nearly a week and even he’d been unprepared for the feelings of lost and emptiness that washed over him. He had chosen Danny over her and now he had to live with the consequences

As he shut his eyes the endless sleepless nights were catching up with him, yet even now he didn’t sleep, he couldn’t.
After months of slowly breaking down Chrissie’s defences he finally got what he wanted and now as he sat here he’d give anything to go back, he’d give up everything just so he could return to the life he’d left behind, to life he could have had with her
Opening his eyes he watched the icy wind scoop up the fallen leaves into the air, he carried on watching them disappear into the sky and he wished he could follow them and just float away, no cares, no worries, just the feeling of being free and maybe just maybe he could get back all he lost

Glancing down at his feet, he needed to feel freedom again, he wasn’t a keeper or a nurse to his brother yet why was he still defending him and picking him up when he lost control, what about being selfish for once and living a life that he wanted instead of one he felt duty bound to live
He was tied to Danny, his brother and he was tied to a life of nothing, he was hanging on to everything by a thread, his job if you could call it that, their home it wasn’t much but it had a roof and he could lose it all because Danny couldn’t put down the bottle or take the needle from his vein, nothing could control Danny not even his own brother not anymore, he’d lost him for good
Getting up he wandered across the park and he knew he couldn’t live like this anymore but he had made a choice and as usual his choice had consequences, consequences for Danny, for himself, for his family and for Chrissie

[diamond1]

dannys a bit of a pain sometimes isnt he?bet jakes like

[squillyfer]

I love this more soon!!!

[Tamzi]

This is really good. Trust Danny to be getting in the way. Can't wait for more.
xxx

[Amber]

Brilliant! More soon, I hope

[Angeldelight]

Part Three

Thinking will not overcome fear but action will
~ W. Clement Stone ~

A week later Chrissie stood behind the bar of the Vic, the pub she won by default and was chained to alone, again she was still alone.

Johnny walked through the square with Tina on his arm, thinking over changing suppliers for the club. He opened the doors of the Queen Vic for Tina and smiled across at Chrissie. Chrissie froze to the spot, was she meant to say, how should she act? She took a deep cleansing breath and pushed all the doubts and worries aside. He didn’t know and wasn’t likely to bring it up, not in a pub full of punters. She’d handle this like she did everything else, put on a smile and survive. The image of Jake standing in her bedroom doorway flashed into her mind, she could admit now that she’d known even then, she’d known he was there to say good-bye, ’good-bye Jake, good-bye Chrissie’. She pushed the memory aside with doubts and worries, he was gone and she was here she’d survive; she’d always been a survivor.
Johnny- an orange juice and white wine please Chrissie
Chrissie nodded, coming up, she moved away to pour the drinks

Chrissie watched Johnny take the drinks over to Tina, she saw the way he looked at her, the way he stroked a hand over her arm when he talked to Tina. The way Tina smiled at him, laughed at his joke, leaned over for a quick kiss. Chrissie felt the pang of jealousy run through her, why was she jealous? She knew, she’d never had that she realised, not with Steve and definitely not with Den, she’d never been an equal, never been loved for being just Chrissie. She had never felt completely loved, the simple affection she watched now made her yearn. Yearn for Jake and for what they could have had together, yearn slightly for the man she’d killed, and the life she thought they’d have together. But they were just yearnings and dreams, you couldn’t live your life on those you had reality to look at, you had to just carry on, and may be hoping that one day, they’d be more than that.

Chrissie closed the doors and the click of the lock echoed around the empty pub. She moved swiftly over to the other set and clicked the lock. She needed silence and to be alone, her thoughts and feelings had been swirling all week, she had to admit that she’d been waiting and wanting. Waiting and wanting Jake to walk through the doors she’d just locked and take her away, away from this place and from her own memories. May be that’s want she wanted all along, that’s what he’d made her feel, she was just Chrissie with him, an equal, a beautiful woman. Not a murderer, not Den Watts wife and not a victim, not all the things she felt for months, was that it. Did she just want to be taken away, to pretend to herself that those things hadn’t happened, did she see him as her escape?
She sighed but where was he now? Was he thinking about her? Was he thinking the same thing, glad that he gone, glad that he’d had Danny’s excuse?

[Tamzi]

This is fabby. Porr Chrissie, well Jake should be back soon, I hope. Can't wait for JBL's bit
xxx

[diamond1]

jbl?