eastenders comedy

[Tannie]

aw brilliant hunnie that made me laugh espicially the demented gerbil one haha

[crazy_purple]

The last couple of weeks, condensed: (promise I'll do some properly next week!)

There is a party and Sonia and Naomi get drunk. They are having fun, so Sonia decides to kiss her. Naomi is all "Whaaaaat?" Me too.

Ickle baby Freddie gets whacked with a stick by Demon Child Bobby. Social Services think Lil Mo might have hit the Fredster herself (well, it gets boring when you're doing the ironing) so they send a woman round. Lil Mo goes crazee.

Mr Ben still has a secret, Pauline is still angry at him for God knows what, Bert still looks like a chicken.

Dot is all gossipy and Lil Mo gets upset because suddenly everyone thinks she is evil because Freddie cries a lot. Have they never met any babies before? Anyway, Mo breaks down and cries and feels all aloooone, woe. I actually feel sorry for her (but not her hair).

Keith proposed and Rosie = squee!

I can't remember what else happened. Oh yeah, it all came out about Honey's baby and Mr. Honey was sad. Honey wants him to leave. No, don't leave! He is teh funneh. Well, he was, until he had been in the Square for more than ten minutes.That place must be really depressing.

And Sonia leaves her husband to go off with her best mate. As you do. Martin walks in on Naomi in her dressing gown and Sonia in bed naked and the gears turn in his head and he is all "Oh."

[feelingyellow]

Lmao! Fabolous! Especially like DEMON CHILD lol

Yay, more next week!

[kirstienod]

demon child its brill. more soon

[Kim]

screaming his name repeatedly and SAYING IT WRONG. That's even worse.

It sounded more like Knee Co. Does Ponytail mean Knee and Co? Never heard of that before, must keep an eye out. Someone go and threaten the editor of the daily mail please. You really should take over from Jaci Steven, your writing is a whole lot more entertaining than hers'.

[crazy_purple]

It sounded more like Knee Co. Does Ponytail mean Knee and Co? Never heard of that before, must keep an eye out. Someone go and threaten the editor of the daily mail please. You really should take over from Jaci Steven, your writing is a whole lot more entertaining than hers'.

ooh that reminds me, I haven't read her column for this week yet... must go nick the paper off my dad. i watched Friday's ep and I'll do it in a min

[crazy_purple]

Potato Head's back! Ben is amazing in his awwwwww factor. Are they really related?

Yolande declares to Pauline that she's going to have an affair to get her own back on Patrick. Yes. That should solve everything nicely. (You know, I could have sworn that affairs were supposed to be secret things, not the kind that you announce in a launderette in the same tone of voice as "I'm going to a party!")

Lil Mo's hair makes her look about fifty.

Anyway, Yolande doesn't have an affair in the end. Sigh. Well, she tells Patrick about that, and then gets kind of p*ssed at him because he doesn't want to leave her. And then she tells him that if he ever does anything like it again, she really is leaving. I think I speak for us all when I say: eh?

Sonia and Naomi saunter around the square. It's funny how, now they're together, the characters don't have anything to do except wander around getting the deadeye given to them because they're Jacksons. (Harry Hill rules.)

Phil threatens Ian with a birthday cake. Ian trembles. Look, mate, you could just have blown the candles out from there, you realise that don't you? Ben walks in and is all "MY CAKE!" Or possibly it was "my brother!" I don't know. I'd have gone for the cake.

Peggy and Jack are gonna get it on (in the event of an emergency, oxygen masks will drop from above your head) but someone walks in. This always happens.

Stacey and Brad are also gonna get it on but turns out Brad is all shy and cute. Shut up.

Phil and Ben are eventually making friends quite well (and I learnt how to start a car, so hide the keys) until Ian comes in and screams "MOIDERER!" at him. No, not really. Ben is all "Run away! Run away!" like in Monty Python and drops his model car on the floor where it BREAKS SYMBOLICALLY, showing the SHATTERED BOND between father and son. Seriously EE, you could make it a bit more difficult.

[feelingyellow]

Lmao! Fabolous! I was thinking about the candles lol More soon please!

[crazy_purple]

An opening sequence which is just pure WTF. Argh. There is a countdown going and Phil rushing around panicking, which gives the impression that he is going to explode or something when it gets to zero.

Now he has blood on his hands like Lady Macbeth... OMFG Phil killed Dennis?! OR DID HE?! This is like a music video. Extremely crap graphics of fireworks exploding. Johnny appears and is all "MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!" Then the screen starts going sideways so we realise it's all a dream. Thank God for that. (For a moment I thought they were going to say that the whole New Years Eve thing had been a dream, and Dennis was alive and hawt, but sadly no.)

Grant is ace. Tracy spoke! Everybody faints. Phil lurks in the Arches and then brings out another Tape of Doom and Exposition (yay!) Is it wrong that I find Grant attractive?


Then Billy moans for a bit so Phil gives him a random job to shut him up, and Phil 'n' Grant get in their Range Rover to drive off somewhere. This whole episode has a golf theme, you may notice. At this point I started to despair because I had no clue what was going on. It's not good to be so confuzzled.

They are on the motorway. There is background music. I wish Grant would keep his eyes on the road. "Mullering"! Now yoghurt has a whole new meaning. Ah, golf. Ah, matching jumpers.

Garry and Minty call Billy a "pull ranker" repeatedly, to get the max innuendo possible out of 8pm on Monday night. Tsk, tsk.

"Right Said Fred have reformed" by some random - hehe. Grant moans at Phil for holding a vodka bottle. Phil protests that he was in fact practising for a play, and the bottle was being Macbeth. See? See? That's also why he had blood on his hands in his dream. There's an explanation for everything... And he won't tell Grant because his passion for the theatre isn't manly and it is his secret shame. Yes. ....I'll get on with it, shall I?

Oooo, he said "smartar$e".... What's with the blokes taking the mess? It was funny when it was just one random thing earlier. Lads - learn how to be funny properly. I like the "Ow!" offscreen.

I've discovered something amazing. The Mitchells are actually quite entertaining. And their car number is S203 KGM, if anyone is interested. You could get it off eBay. XD

Is it just me, or does Grant seem increasingly gay? "This. You. Me. Our kids." Phil is all "but I'm not ready for commitment!"

They aren't going golfing, are they? Phil's off on that hunch. Or maybe he isn't, they're at a golfing place. Or maybe not! Man, I love it when I'm right. JOHNNY!

I haven't worked out yet whether it was supposed to be actual Dennis's blood, or metaphorical for Phil's guilt at letting Johnny get away with it. I'm currently going for the second... EE's more interesting than I thought (especially because I can laugh at it at the same time.)

[feelingyellow]

Lmao! Fabolous, last night's episode was so dull but you've mad it a hell lot better!
I find Grant attractive too! So no it is not wrong! He better not be gay lol
More soon more soon!