The day started like any other. Up at 6 o’clock, ironing, quick health drink, unplugging the iron, leaving the house, going down the drive then returning once more to check the door is locked, while there maybe just re-hang that shirt and check for creases for good measure, then off for the 96km run before breakfast of skinny water and diet ice.
It was now 6.15am and Nikhil was ready to tackle anything the day threw at him.
Running through the village he paused at the strange sounds coming from a random bush.
“sigh” “sigh” “cackle” “sigh”
There was no mistaking the dulcet tones of Cameron and Chas.
“Their warm up sounds really vigorous” thought Nikhil. “I wonder how far they are going to go?”
Picking up his pace again he ran on and rounding a corner at full speed he almost trod on Debbie’s bottom lip that was dragging across the floor.
“Sorry Debbie – are you okay?” asked Nikhil jogging on the spot.
“It’s Sarah.. she’s…”
“Jolly good” Nikhil answered before running on. Nikhil knew not to make small chat with Debbie – it only depressed him and the rest of the village and the audience sitting at home.
Further on an ambulance raced past Nikhil. “Wonder what that could be?” he pondered.
Seconds later he saw the ambulance crew surgically removing Adam from his quadbike. A nasty piece of work and a real pain in the bum. The procedure wasn’t too nice either.
Breathing in the fresh country air Nikhil became lost in his thoughts.
“200 bon bons and 3 boxes of mocha” he mused.
Suddenly a huge gust of wind almost sent him flying. Yes – Val had opened her gob again. This time she was having an almighty ding dong with Brenda. Seeing his girlfriends mother in such strife Nikhil did what Nikhil does best and ran on.
Heading back to the village he thought about his relationship with his PA and of how enormously fat she was getting.
“Maybe I should get her to join Cameron and Chas on their next workout,” he thought. One thing he was sure of was that he had to hurry back and start work at the factory – before Gennie ate the whole production line.

Then suddenly something caught his eye. Why had he never seen it before? How could he have been so blind? All the time right in front of his face and only now did he realise how he felt about her. He knew he had to tell her there and then. If she rejected him – so what – at least he tried. Slowing his pace down to a steady walk he approached her. Taking a big breath he looked up at her and said……. “Morning Edna”!!!!

TO BE CONTINUED