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View Full Version : The Bezmeister meets Colette......



sbbb_beryl
14-10-2008, 17:27
Good Afternooony sbbb peeps.

Im here for a speical edition of Beryls Big Gob

It took a while but finally, i have managed to meet up with colette! Yep shes been busy painting, decorating, and building houses with her own two hands and found it hard to fit me into her busy schedule and we all know how old cols likes to keep to her rotas!

anyway ive finally managed to clear a space for her too and can finally show you the interview

Colette phoned me to say yep can meet but i had to meet her at one of her developments..... Great i think im looking for somewhere to buy maybe this could be my new dream house, so i sling on my glad rags, high shoes, all made up, best underwear ( hey you never know when there could be a nice rich property developr on site) and drive on down to the meeeting place! what was i faced with a dirty muddy building site and me in my best manolos , would you belive i had to sit on a muddy old pile of bricks to conduct this interview!!!!

The things i do for a whopping paycheck and you guys!

so enjoy the interview.........



Beryl:

So... cols, can i call you cols, well im gonna anyway lets get straight down to the most important question shall we...


THE ROTA.... the dreaded rota.. WTF was that all about... you were kinda obsessed with that...

Colette

Well, you don't succeed at anything in life unless you give it your best. Coming on at any hour wasn't going to ensure that there was someone watching the fire at all times. Things are very organised in my life with me being a real estate developer; that lot wouldn't know organised if it came along and strangled them!


* beryl looks at the mess around her, how can anyone call this organised*

Beryl

i think a few of your housemates wanted to strangle you at the time though colette :lol:

anyway moving on otherwise i know well talk bloody rotas all day.........

The mirrors???

Colette

Mirrors?

Beryl

OOOOOO kkkkkkkkk Your just as confused at the rest of us about them then??? :confused:

and lastly the tokesns???? what tokens? did you have some kind of pyschic link with big brother?

Colette

Well, there've been tokens on Big Brother in the past, I didn't see why there couldn't be again. I also thought that there may be a jail as this has happened before and this turned out to be the case, so I thought the tokens might go the same way.


Beryl

:confused: have there, what on sbbb??????? :confused:

* tries to think when the tokens were ever on sbbb....... racks brains..... mind starts to wander..... spys a fit builder up a ladder..... thinks corrrrr look at that ****........... little bit of droool falls from mouth..... realises its been a while and there is a strange silence between her and colette and colette is looking at her weird......*

Oh urmmmmmm where was i???

* checks notes* OH yeah

Ok moving away form your strange momens let get down to some nitty gritty talk about your fellow housemates. be truthful here i wont tell anyone :D


Who did you hate... i mean really detest..... and why??

Colette

I HATED Pharell! Or should I say Farrell. I hated the way he spoke to people as if they were something he'd just scraped off of the bottom of his shoe or something. His snide little comments about depression were completely uncalled for; if people want to have an early night then that's entirely up to them, especailly after having a mole revealed. Depression is a serious illness and he just seemed to be using it as a joke.


Beryl
Hmmm I watched that clip over and over again and i do think you took his depression comment the wrong way but we wont go on about that again......

Best housmate????

Colette

That's a tough one. I'll have to go with Jack. I found it hard enough coming in and meeting that many new people in one go, I can't begin to think what it must have been like for Jack. He brought some entertainment to the house too.

Beryl

Really, that surprises me i really didnt think you liked him..... a few comments he made seemed to annoy you....

who did you fancy?? dont go telling me nobody coz that will be a big fat lie.... all those fit men you had to lust over one of them? who cols who?

t

Colette

If I have to say then Aaron. He's got the looks and he seemed to be the only one that didn't believe that the sun shone out of Pharrell's rear end.

Beryl

*thinks back to her and aarons drunken nights together and makes a puke face*

Maybe you and aaron could get it together now your outcols......

I chose Lisa for the hand grenade purely for entertainment value. That and I didn't appreciate her suggesting that they spend the budget on ear plugs, booze and whatever when all I was trying to do was ensure that we passed the task! She claimed she'd "scream her titties off" if I mentioned the rota one more time and kicked up a fuss about being sent to jail over the fire, so I thought it would be fun to see her "scream her titties off" about having rations and cold showers for a week.




Beryl

:lol: it was funny.....i thought it was a great choice:lol:

Whathave you been up to since you left teh house? Nuts magazine? Zoo??? FHM? or have you gone down the safe route and done Heat mag??

and what does the future hold for our cols???

Colette


No rest for the wicked as they say; been back to work. Property doesn't develop itself!

A nice early retirement in the Caribbean after all my hard work. Being in the house was a welcome break but work must be done if you want to get anywhere in life.


Beryl

What you turned down Nuts magazine??? they pay loads and its sooo liberating getting the jugs out for all those blokes......

Colette, i wish you well lets hope you dont work too hard and give yourself a heart attack before you get to the carribean.... if youd got them bobs out for nuts and fhm you would already be there.....

Thanks colette i just gotta do something, will see ya soon.... * totters off to fit builder, heel gets stuck in some mud and beryl falls flat on face into mud*

ahhhhhh........ oh fook...... dont be showing that, you better cut it.......

* back to studio*

OMFG, WHY DO THE NEVER CUT THOSE BITS OUT :angry:

so i finally met her... shes nice enough, exaCtly what i was expecting really..

Im off loveies, dont forget to tune into sbbb tonight when davina will be speaking to the house when they least expect it and tune into tomorrow when if im lucky ill be talking to the next evicted housemate

see yas all later

remember i loves ya all

MWAH

Siobhan
14-10-2008, 17:38
hahahaha.. that was brill!!!