Girls Night Out

[JustJodi]

GIRLS NIGHT OUT

"Why females should avoid a girls night out after they are married!.."

The other night I was invited out for a night with "the girls." I told
my husband that I would be home by midnight, "I promise!" Well, the
hours passed and the margaritas went down way too easy.

Around 3 a.m., a bit loaded, I headed for home. Just as I got in the
door, the cuckoo clock in the hall started up and cuckooed 3 times.

Quickly, realizing my husband would probably wake up, I cuckooed another
9 times. I was really proud of myself for coming up with such a
quick-witted solution, in order to escape a possible conflict with him.

(Even when totally smashed...3 cuckoos plus 9 cuckoos totals 12 cuckoos
= MIDNITE!)

The next morning my husband asked me what time I got in, and I told him
"Midnight". He didn't seem pissed off at all. Whew! Got away with
that one! Then he said, "We need a new cuckoo clock."

When I asked him "why?", he said, "Well, last night our clock cuckooed
three times, then said, "Oh. ****.", cuckooed 4 more times, cleared it's
throat, cuckooed another 3 times, giggled, cuckooed twice more, and then
tripped over the coffee table and farted.":rotfl: :rotfl:

[Dr. Tangliss]

:rotfl: That's really funny!:rotfl:

[JustJodi]

:rotfl: That's really funny!:rotfl:

I loved it too,, i knew I had to share it with u guys,, :rotfl: :lol: :thumbsup:

[JustJodi]

Farmer John's Sign



Farmer John lived on a quiet rural highway. But, as time went by, the traffic built up at an alarming rate. The traffic was so heavy and so fast that his chickens were being run over at a rate of two to three per day.

So one day Farmer John called the sheriff's office and said, "You've got to do something about all of these people driving so fast and killing all of my chickens."

"What do you want me to do?" asked the sheriff. "I don't care, just do something about those crazy drivers!"

So the next day he had the county workers go out and erected a sign that said: SLOW, SCHOOL CROSSING

Three days later Farmer John called the sheriff and said, "You've got to do something about these drivers. The 'school crossing' sign seems to make them go even faster."

So, again, the sheriff sends out the county workers and they put up a new sign: SLOW, CHILDREN AT PLAY.

That really sped them up.

So Farmer John called and called and called every day for three weeks.

Finally, he asked the sheriff, "Your signs are doing no good. Can I put up my own sign?"

The sheriff told him, "Sure thing, put up your own sign." He was going to let Farmer John do just about anything in order to get him to stop calling every day to complain. The sheriff got no more calls from Farmer John.

Three weeks later, curiosity got the best of the sheriff and he decided to give Farmer John a call. "How's the problem with those drivers. Did you put up your sign?"

"Oh, I sure did. And not one chicken has been killed since then. I've got to go. I'm very busy." He hung up the phone.

The sheriff was really curious now and he thought to himself : "I'd better go out there and take a look at that sign... it might be something that we could use to slow down drivers..." So the sheriff drove out to Farmer John's house, and his jaw dropped the moment he saw the sign. It was spray-painted on a sheet of wood:

"NUDIST COLONY"

[Jessie Wallace]

I like the first one better, very funny.

[Dr. Tangliss]

I loved it too,, i knew I had to share it with u guys,, :rotfl: :lol: :thumbsup:


At first I thought it was really you that did it.:lol:

[JustJodi]

At first I thought it was really you that did it.:lol:

sssshhhhh not so loud, we don't want the ones in the cheap seats to know this :moonie: :rotfl:

[Dr. Tangliss]

sssshhhhh not so loud, we don't want the ones in the cheap seats to know this :moonie: :rotfl:

:rotfl: :clap: :rotfl:

[di marco]

GIRLS NIGHT OUT

"Why females should avoid a girls night out after they are married!.."

The other night I was invited out for a night with "the girls." I told
my husband that I would be home by midnight, "I promise!" Well, the
hours passed and the margaritas went down way too easy.

Around 3 a.m., a bit loaded, I headed for home. Just as I got in the
door, the cuckoo clock in the hall started up and cuckooed 3 times.

Quickly, realizing my husband would probably wake up, I cuckooed another
9 times. I was really proud of myself for coming up with such a
quick-witted solution, in order to escape a possible conflict with him.

(Even when totally smashed...3 cuckoos plus 9 cuckoos totals 12 cuckoos
= MIDNITE!)

The next morning my husband asked me what time I got in, and I told him
"Midnight". He didn't seem pissed off at all. Whew! Got away with
that one! Then he said, "We need a new cuckoo clock."

When I asked him "why?", he said, "Well, last night our clock cuckooed
three times, then said, "Oh. ****.", cuckooed 4 more times, cleared it's
throat, cuckooed another 3 times, giggled, cuckooed twice more, and then
tripped over the coffee table and farted.":rotfl: :rotfl:

lol thats funny! :D