View Full Version : Stupid Question, Stupid Answer
I'm not sure whether this has been done on this message board before, but i've done it on another and it is really funy if you let your imagination run wild!
I'm going to write a stupid question at the end of this, and all you have to do is answer is in an imaginative way, then type another stupid question. Remember, when you've answered the question, type another question or it wont work.
EXAMPLE:
Q) Why is the sky blue?
A) Blue Ghomes from the planet ZuZu attempted world domination. They entered the atmosphere, and due to the emense pressure, they burst, causing the sky to be sprayed blue. Not all of it was covered, therefore leaving white spots, now known as clouds
Q)Why is ketchup red?
Q)Why is ketchup red?
It wasn't, until the day Mr Brown decided to stick his finger in the grinder.
Q: Explain why 2+2 = 4
It used to be VI until kermet the frog married Miss Piggry and had twins and they swoped their 2 seater for a 2+2.
Q: Why do elephants have tusks?
Because the sky was falling down on them so they grew trunks to hold the sky up
Q: Why are radiators hot?
.:Kitz:.
08-04-2005, 13:32
To ward off evil ice spirits from the under world.
Q) Why are television screens square?
Bad Wolf
08-04-2005, 14:07
because if they were round you would confuse them with a fish bowl
what happened to cassette tapes? where they eaten by the tape monster who is now on vcr tapes???!!! DOES ANYONE KNOW!!!!?
The world was running out of ribbbons, so they got all the cassette tapes, took out the recording strips and made ribbons out of them.
Why is the world round?
Bad Wolf
08-04-2005, 14:26
because if it was square you could fall for the edge and it makes planetary bowling that aliens play more fun
why is the sun hot?
true.moon
08-04-2005, 14:34
in space they needed to have somewhere to sunbathe
why is the computer mouse called a mouse?
.:Kitz:.
08-04-2005, 15:19
Because it scares off elephants
Q) Why are hedgehogs prickly?
true.moon
08-04-2005, 15:22
they think becuse they think becuase they are small they aren't cool so the spike their fur up to look cool
why is the moon so bright?
.:Kitz:.
08-04-2005, 15:29
So space women can see what they are doing when they are putting eyeshadow on up in space.
Q) Why do photocopiers make so much noise?
because they are really a type of alien called noiseonitors from the under world, who disguise as photocopiers to spy on the world. They typically make a lot of noise.
Q) How long is a piece of string?
because if they were round you would confuse them with a fish bowl
what happened to cassette tapes? where they eaten by the tape monster who is now on vcr tapes???!!! DOES ANYONE KNOW!!!!?
:rotfl:
Q) How long is a piece of string?[/QUOTE]
A) about this " " long i think!
Q) Why is honey sweet?
true.moon
09-04-2005, 16:22
bees have sugar all over them and when they carry it the sugar gets stuck in it
why is the sun yellow?
because blue would just be stupid!
why are trees green?
true.moon
09-04-2005, 18:09
trunks hair is green
why do we have freckles?
because our long past great grandfather sunbathed using a sive and altered his DNA - which has since been passed down to us.
Q. Why do humans have a brain?
true.moon
09-04-2005, 20:17
to fill up our head becuase if we didnt have one our head whould be like a pea
why is your tounge pink?
our great, great, grandfathers, sisters, brother in law once removeds dad ate too many strawberrys and altered his dna
Why is grass green?
true.moon
09-04-2005, 21:05
bugs wee is green
why do deers have antlers?
RealityGap
09-04-2005, 21:24
deer have antlers so that the wood sprites have somewhere to hang their coats on, on a warm summers eve
why is a trombone called a trombone?
.:Kitz:.
09-04-2005, 21:26
coz it would dumb to call it something else
Q. Why do cats have whiskers?
RealityGap
09-04-2005, 21:34
because dogs have pedigree chum
why did it take so long to find Nemo?
true.moon
09-04-2005, 21:37
because dogs have pedigree chum
why did it take so long to find Nemo?
that is funny
true.moon
09-04-2005, 21:38
they were playing hide and seek
why do turtles have a shell
because every1 needs somewhere to get petrol
q) who invented the nose?
true.moon
09-04-2005, 22:06
lol thats a good 1
true.moon
09-04-2005, 22:08
boogeman
why is there cows in fields
they used to be on the hills like the sheep and fell down and were too fat to
Q. Why do babies cry at 2 a.m. in the morning?
Coz the boggie man comes out at 2.am
Q.Why are footballs round
true.moon
09-04-2005, 22:53
it was meant to be the moon but they disigned it wrong so they shrunk it
why are cds round?
because paper is rectangular
q) who invented the curling tongs?
RealityGap
10-04-2005, 13:46
princess Sarah of Narnia fell in love with Prince Christopher of Timbucktoo but Evil Queen Angela of Timbucktoo forbade Princess Sarah to marry her son as she had straight hair and Queen Angela was very very hairish again "straigties" so Princess Sarah contacted the local metal smith, one Arthur Curling-Tong to come up with an invention to put curls in her flowing locks and alow her to marry Prince Christopher. Arthur Curling-Tong did indeed manage to come up with a fantastic device, which were originally called Arthur's but they didn't sell and were re-launched with the new name Curling-Tongs.
So the short anwser to your question is Arthur Curling-tong
q) who ate all the pies?
pie_man :)
Q. why are mondays so hard to get through?
A. Because its a technical glitch in the matrix, On a monday there are 120 seconds to a minute, and the day lags on... and on... and ON!
Q. Why can only some people roll their tongue or touch their nose with their tongue :D
:P
because they were born in a point in time when aliens suddenly took over the world meaning they can use there tongues more, because on the aliens planets tongues are used to kill people.
Q: Why are there 7 colours in the rainbow
well really there are 3 million two hundred thousand and seventeen but we can only see 7. However if you eat whiskers the night before the day of the full moon you will see all the colours - that is if it should rain and shine that day!
Q. Why does the early bird get the worm?
RealityGap
11-04-2005, 00:44
the early bird gets the worm because worms are on special offer in Tesco and they are all snapped up early so the later birds have to do with over priced grubs instead
q) why did the chicken cross the road?
It had short term memory loss and forgot it had already done that to get to the other side.
Q. Why is there always so much month left at the end of the money?
RealityGap
11-04-2005, 14:47
sorry Rain - you got me with this one, looking forwards to getting the awnser!!
LOL
because of Steven Hawkins theory of the big bang. He states that their exists a financial phenomina called "where's my money gone its only the 23rd of this month and I'll have to borrow some" The only solution to overcome this is to marry a rich person (any offers?)
Q. Who killed the last dodo?
A. The dodo was lonely and decided it didn't want to live anymore, So in a suicide attempt, It jumped off a cliff. (Awhh)
Q. Why do you sometimes walk into a room and forget why you wanted to go into the room?
Because Tony Blair has installed devices over all doors to control people's minds so he makes you forget what you needed to do and instead become his slave.
Q. Why does ice cream melt?
There was a singer called Vanilla Ice who sang "Ice Ice Baby", and another singer called Prince who sang "Cream". Along came Simon Cowell and got a nobody to release a hit called "Ice Cream". Since it got nowhere, people in the know call it an "Ice Cream Melt".
Q: Why is a pet for life and not just xmas?
because if your anything like me, when it craps all over your floor you feel the urge to punish it day after day, which turns into a life long ambition.
Q. if you thought you were the last person on earth and jumped off a 20 storey building, would you feel totally nissed off when you passed the 17th floor and heard the phone ringing??
no because that would be the last boy on earth(Very ugly etc.) asking me to marry him.
Q. Why is holly so prickly?
Because Patrick was a big ass.
Q. Why do cows go "moo"?
Because that is the sound made in ancient times when the world is about to end. Run
Q.Which came first the chicken or the egg?
Neither...it has been proven on CSI that eggs were genetically engineered by gill girsham and chickens are the result of rod stewart making love to a fur coat.
Q. Does bertie basset really get upset when you eat his family??
No because BErtie Basset is actually a cannibal that was planning on eating his own family that night if they hadn't eaten by a human.
Q.why do computers always crash just before you save a great piece of work?
because "intel inside" is computer code for "idiot outside"
Q. can pigs fly?
no they cant, have you ever seen a man fly??????????
Q.Why do vampires hate Garlic?
makes their breath smell
Q. If a tree falls in the woods and no one is around, does it make a sound?
yes because faries live in the wood and they hear it, DUH!
Q.what cheese is made backwards?
RealityGap
11-04-2005, 22:58
the crummyflowingdale cheese is the only cheese in the world that is made backwards by the tibetian monks, they make is backwards as it smells like minging feet
although edam is of course the word "made"backwards
Q) why is the new black never black?
because in the politically correct world of general elections you can't call a spade a spade or a moron a moron or a liar a liar or a woman a woman or a black a black or a useless MP a useless MP -therefore the new black is always a shade of grey (or gray for our American friends :) ). Now my teacher once said, ........
Q. what on earth am I staring at a screen at midnight when I should be asleep?
RealityGap
12-04-2005, 12:58
(pie_man you are so witty :))
Pie_man was still staring at his screen when he should have been asleep because he is scared of the monsters living below his bed :P
Q) why is there never enough time in the day to get everything done?
Bad Wolf
12-04-2005, 13:00
because that would be too easy!
why do i have writers block and can't do my essay?
because you are about to write a fantastic novel and a certain prime minister doesn't want it revealed to the world.
Bad Wolf
12-04-2005, 13:17
stupid question?
Bad Wolf
12-04-2005, 13:20
i can't do my essays so it would seem so
why do we speak english?
because we are too dumb to learn german
Q.Why do dogs chase sticks instead of cats
SarahWakefield
12-04-2005, 13:32
Q) why do adults say oh i slept like a baby last nite? babys wake up all night long crying!
Q) why do adults say oh i slept like a baby last nite? babys wake up all night long crying!
I think you need to read the beginning of the thread to see how the game is played.
because we are too dumb to learn german
Q.Why do dogs chase sticks instead of cats
umm dogs do chase cats
Q. Why does the sun lighten our hair but darken our skin?
because the level of brain activity decreases as the temperature of the brain goes up therefore to continue to function correctly the body adjusts automatically by sucking the nutrients from the hair.
The skin darkens due to the phenomena known as "chavy-titus" - its known to affect certain socio-economic groups that inhabit parts of Britain and has been known in the medical world for 20 years - stripey top, cap, jog bottoms, rockport shoes etc. No on really knows why this occurs but the government is spending an estimated £2 billion / year trying to correct it.
Q. why are husbands always right in an arguement :) ?
Bad Wolf
12-04-2005, 19:18
because they lie
question: who says husbands are right?
di marco
12-04-2005, 20:41
only men say the husbands are right. even though they wont admit it they do believe that the woman is always right! :D
Q: why does toast always fall butter side down?
husbands do
Q. How much can i get away with and still go to heaven?
bleh i wanted that one di marco :p
only men say the husbands are right. even though they wont admit it they do believe that the woman is always right! :D
Q: why does toast always fall butter side down?
Toast is sadistic and evil thats why.
Q. If cats always land on their feet and toast always lands butter side down, what would happen if you tied a piece of toast to a cats back and dropped it off the worktop?
because they lie
question: who says husbands are right?
:rotfl:
The RSCPA would come down with an officer and strecher away the cat and lock you up for 7.2359 years for cruelty. Also you may have "cat nightmares" not evry nice things to have.
Q. why can't dolphins talk?
If they opened their mouth to try and take a breath and talk their mouths would fill with water and they would choke to death. How cruel are you????? Makes my cat experiment look mild :p
Q. Why do potatoes have eyes they can't see out of?
Bad Wolf
13-04-2005, 14:10
they can, you just dont know it
Q: is this the way to amarillo?
No, it's left at the number 43 bus stop on church street.
Q. Why when you go to your childrens parents evening do you feel the need to whisper to other people then look around to see if any teachers heard you?
Hmmm, A- Because its instinctive to look around. And you wnated a nose to see who has fit dads..
Q. Skittles Taste The Rainbow what does this mean?
Haven't you ever licked a rainbow?
Q. Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here and drink whatever comes out?"
Bad Wolf
13-04-2005, 17:58
his name was bob, and people thought he was crazy as he kept putting things in his mouth, eventualy he got on to a cow
how did et know how to phone hime?
he used yell.com
Q. Where exactly in the nursery rhyme does it say Humpty Dumpty is an egg?
true.moon
13-04-2005, 19:33
it doesnt its common sense
why do ladybirds have spots?
acne is as bad in ladybirds as it is in humans
Why is coke brown?
di marco
13-04-2005, 21:14
because coke is the most disgusting drink and brown is the most disgusting colour so it makes sense
Q: has anyone ever found the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow?
yes. It was taken by a gang of armed robbers last thursday while we were busy watching TV. The latest reports are that it was blair and brown raising money for the election campaign.
Q. why can't footballers speak correctly on TV?
Chris_2k11
13-04-2005, 23:23
A) because they take out their false teeth before they go on the tele, dur! :rolleyes:
Q) Why do we close our eyes when we sneeze?
RealityGap
14-04-2005, 09:17
we close our eyes to keep the preasure in our heads up so that our brains don't fly out our noses at 100kmph
q) why do people never want to go to bed at night - yet never want to get up in the morning
The yin & yan energy has flip-flopped in the person concerned.
Q. why do babies (12 months +) insist on eating shoes?
eastenders mad
14-04-2005, 18:38
because they can't eat anything else
Q. why do people work in the rain?
Chris_2k11
14-04-2005, 19:03
A) So they dont have to work in the sun!
Q) Why is the grass always greener on the other side?
di marco
14-04-2005, 21:15
because their lawn is better looked after than mine
Q: why does it never rain but it pours?
soap addict queen
14-04-2005, 22:02
a) that's english weather
Q. why is there more month than money
RealityGap
15-04-2005, 09:44
been awnsered before LOL- [QUOTE=pie_man]because of Steven Hawkins theory of the big bang. He states that their exists a financial phenomina called "where's my money gone its only the 23rd of this month and I'll have to borrow some" The only solution to overcome this is to marry a rich person (any offers?)
q) why is weight so much more fun to put on than to take off?
A. Because you dont release endorphins getting it off, whereas you do putting it on! (chocolate.. :D)
Q. Why do maps never work?
di marco
15-04-2005, 21:11
cos the people that made them thought it would be funny if they just drew roads wherever they felt like it to confuse the rest of us
Q: why do cats have 9 lives?
Chris_2k11
15-04-2005, 21:20
A) because cats are special as they were the first ever creature to set foot on earth, shortly followed by dogs and then dinousaurs.
Q) Why are some pens called "fountain" pens?
di marco
15-04-2005, 21:26
cos in the early days cavemen made all their pens by a fountain and these pens were exactly like fountain pens are today
Q: why does the colour red mean danger?
A. Because whent he cavemen dropped a rock on its foot, red stuff came out and his mate says 'Hey thats dangerous!' So thy made a sign saying. DANGER ROCKS and a big red splodge.
Q. Why did the Queen Mother live so long?
di marco
16-04-2005, 20:56
cos they were feeding her special long live medicine. actually that was just the excuse they made in case anyone asked. the truth was cos she was actually an alien
Q: why do rabbits eat their own poo?
RealityGap
17-04-2005, 15:47
because Mrs Bunny is forever telling the rest of the family that it is a rare treat, when in actual fact it is just she forgot to go to Pets at home and buy in the "bunny brunch"
why does the sun rise in the east?
di marco
17-04-2005, 15:53
cos long ago the 2 space monsters, eastie and westie, battled it out to decide where the sun should rise. eastie won the battle so got the sun to rise in the east while westie had to settle with the sun setting in the west
Q: why does father christmas live at the north pole not the south pole?
he used to until Virgin airways stopped flying out there- so santa decided to move south with his workers - he was initialy going to move to china (no labour unions) but couldn't change his diet to suit.
Q: why is it that when you really don't want the phone to ring it does?
becasue the evil bugs in ur head also live in the telephone, and they know when you dont want it to ring, so they make it ring
Q)Why do dogs ears twich when they are thinking?
RealityGap
18-04-2005, 10:08
They are not actually thinking, they are picking up the signals from the alien that is controlling them
Q) why is Pie_man so good at pacman?
A. he is a sad individual who lives in a shoe box at the bottom of the country lane where his only company is the wireless BT broadband service. However he has made a promise not to play for more than 22 hours per day trying to get on to the leader board!
Q - why do chocolcate chip cookies taste so nice - the ones with the mixed brown and white chocolate?
A. Because they have special cemical in them, that taste like heaven...
Q. Why would we rather watch tv than revise?
RealityGap
18-04-2005, 19:04
because the tv's are sending out messages to us that books are evil
Q. why am I sitting here when I should be doing something else?
Chris_2k11
18-04-2005, 19:12
because you are actually strapped to the chair but dont realise it and cant move :eek:
why are girls associated with the colour pink rather than blue?
because when we see a boy we fancy we turn pink not blue!
Q. Why is my room such a mess
di marco
18-04-2005, 20:44
probably for the same reason why my rooms a complete tip! its cos the aliens pick certain peoples rooms to use as i rubbish dump and unfortunately ours were chosen!
Q: why does a leopard never change its spots?
well technically leaopards do not have spots but something called ovaloids.
Our GCSE maths and combined science teacher said that leopards [spelt "lepperds" in northern English] are really trendy (but poor) animals and only have one outfit so can't afford to change their spots. The ones that do have been stealing outfits from M&S and need to reported on crimestoppers on 0800 6060606060606.
Q. why is the sky blue?
A/ because the world was coverd in water until gravity intervened and pushed half the sea up into the air
Q/ why does it never rain but pours?
A. because of global climate change the new water molecules are no longer H2O but IH2O (intellegent water molecules) that seem to know when wimbledon and cricket and weekends start - so they come together and pour out of the sky to annoy us.
Q. Why are CDs round?
so you can put your cup of tea in the disc tray
when does it rain cats and dogs?
dragoneye454
20-04-2005, 14:37
Because hamsters and rabbit wouldn't hurt as much because they are a lot smaller and softer
Why is the world split into countries?
because when godzilla and king nong used to rule the world ther feet wer that big that when they had a rave they danced that frantically it caused cracks it and caused the continent to split into smaller ones
whats odd about odd numbers???
dragoneye454
20-04-2005, 14:48
When they took over planet earth, nobody understood their culture and language. so they were classed as odd.
Why are germs microscopic?
because they were put on a hot wash for to long making them shrink to microscopic sizes
what came first the pencil or the rubber???
Pencil ;)
Q. How many characters in Eastenders?
none its actually a real life documentary
what are tonights lottery numbers
There wont be any, the machine will go bust and numbers will fly everywhere...!
Why do those jury people where blonde wigs? And dont they realise they look stupid!?
because many years ago there was a theif who would steal all the lunches from the courtroom changing rooms so they decided to wera big wigs to hide their packed lunch box under
why are questions called questions ????
a. Because the came men found a jumbled up word carved in the wall and didn't now what it meant, so they decided it was the word for something you dont know the answer to.
q. Why do we have hair?
because rabbits would look silly!
Q. Why do some cars have the most stupid names?
dragoneye454
21-04-2005, 09:16
Because when their parents named them they were going through a name revolution and they wanted their children to be unique.
Why do cars give out fumes?
$sTaCeY$
21-04-2005, 14:39
because they get angry when people leave them a mess :)
Q - why do fish need water
dragoneye454
21-04-2005, 14:50
so they don't have to take showers
what does E=mc2 mean?
it means that there are two DJs and they are both equal in how good they are......erm........what time is it?
Q. why does your nose "run" when you eat a vindaloo?
dragoneye454
21-04-2005, 18:34
because it is scared that the curry monsters will singe its hair
Q. Whats the difference between rice pudding and light rice pudding?
light rice pudding has been cooked in a pressure cooker on top of mount Fuji (closer to the sun) whilst rice pudding has been cooked by Mavis at the Drury Lane Primary school kitchen.
Q. Why can't women understand a simple arguement - they can't ALWAYS be correct? :)
dragoneye454
22-04-2005, 11:48
Because men speak in such a weird language and only have the brain of a gnat so can't understand when they are wrong.
Q> Why are men always wrong lol
.:Kitz:.
22-04-2005, 17:48
Because women are always right!!
Why dish run away with the spoon?
RealityGap
22-04-2005, 21:58
because the dish and the spoon had been having an illicit affair for a long time, and the milk jug whom the dish was married to found out - and threatened violence on the spoon so to save his love the dish ran off with the spoon
Q) why don't minstrels melt in your hand?
di marco
23-04-2005, 13:00
minstrels dont melt in your hands as they know how much people hate it when chocolate is all over their hands. so they want to please the people and keep them happy as they want to be the nations fav snack
Q: why does travelling in cars make some people sick and not others?
RealityGap
24-04-2005, 10:46
some people get sick travelling in cars whilst others remain uneffected due to the sprites that live in cars have strong likes/dislikes to people and if they dislike you they sing songs in your ears that make you feel sick, while if they do like you they leave you alone, and if you are one of the people that don't usually feel car sick but do one day it is because the sprite is in a bad mood. This is the reason that hanging silly plastic things from the back bumpers sometimes cures car sickness, it because you have an extreme sport sprite living in your car and they would rather be hanging off the plastic dangly thing than making you feel miserable.
Q) why do children wake up so early in the morning?
di marco
24-04-2005, 14:09
children wake up so early in the morning cos they complain about going to bed so early. if they wake up early and then wake their parents up then they hope that they will be allowed to go to bed later so that they will wake up later and so wont disturb their parents
Q: should homework still be called homework even if you do it at school just before the lesson where it has to be handed in?
dragoneye454
25-04-2005, 11:01
Yes because when you spend 11-18 years of your life in school/college/university. The government decides that it is a second home and that if they had their way children would live at school doing slave labour and tax reports unbeknownest to their parents.
Q. Why are school trips called field trips when most of the time they don't go to fields?
.:Kitz:.
25-04-2005, 16:05
Because in the stone age the cave men would take thier cave kids on feild trips of educational purposes to learn about feilds. Then some wise acher decided that there should be a 'cave school' for the kids. But they like the idea of feild trips so much that they decided to keep it.
Why is when there is only one chocolate biscuit left in the tin you just HAVE to eat it? Why?!?
di marco
25-04-2005, 20:50
cos otherwise the choccie biscuit would get lonely all by itself and would feel sad that no one wanted to eat it and would think that it wasnt good enough! lol!
Q: why are shakespeares plays called classics when no one has a clue what theyre on about?
dragoneye454
26-04-2005, 09:04
because when you listen to classical music, there are no words and you can't understand the music so they decide to put them in the same box.
Why is it that when you have a bad day everything else seems to go wrong
-cough- Thats why it's generally known as a bad day.
Before they invented drawing boards, what did they go back to???
the cave walls
why do only smarties have the answer
di marco
26-04-2005, 16:27
cos even though they are only little they are clever, this is cos they are lots of brightly different colours and the bright colours make them bright! (also its a good thing to write in an exam when you dont know the answer!)
Q: why are frosties more than good, theyre great?
$sTaCeY$
26-04-2005, 16:30
because there's nothing good about them, there just great to eat
Q - Why do cats chase mice and bring them back for thier owners to chase around the house :lol: :rotfl:
di marco
26-04-2005, 16:34
cos cats are experts in catching mice but they dont think their owners are (this is cos they dont give their cats mice to eat but catfood). so the cats want to teach their owners how to catch them so then they will always have them for their tea
Q: why are little girls made of sugar and spice and all things nice but little boys are made of slugs and snails and puppydogs tails?
.:Kitz:.
26-04-2005, 16:59
Coz at Willy Wonka's sweet factory they wanted to make something that portrayed the inner feelings of kids today. And girls did a survey on boys and girls and there are the results!
Why do people say 'if you fall off your bike, dust your self off and try again'? It hurts!
dragoneye454
27-04-2005, 12:17
Because it is the people that are watching you that are saying that and they want another laugh.
Why do you have to swear on the bible in court even if you are not religious??
erm......you got me on that one! I know so you can lie and get away with it!
Q. what size does a watch have to be in order to be called a clock?
dragoneye454
27-04-2005, 13:00
the size when it is big enough that when someone gets clocked on the head it actually hurts.
How can you tell when rain stops?
because aliens invade
how do photos become photos?
di marco
30-04-2005, 08:03
photos are photos when everyone in them looks dreadful, unless of course the person is very famous/rich, then they will look alright!
Q: why does it get colder as you go up a mountain, even though you are getting nearer the sun?
because there is a layer called the "santa layer". it's a bit like the ozone layer but colder and allows santa to whizz through the air and get to everyone's house in one night. But due to climate change its is getting warmer and santa is getting older - so he is looking at purchasing Dr WHo's tardis (donations to be made to www.soapboards.co.uk/santa-project) - the tardis is up for sale since the ratings are prdicted to fall and fall.
Q. Why do mobiles always run out of battery power just as you need it fully charged for the weekend?
di marco
01-05-2005, 16:14
cos the aliens that work at the battery power station are fed up with all the times we use our phones as they have to work really long hours. so they get rid off all the battery to annoy us just like we are annoying them
Q: why is it that when we have a king we also have a queen, but when we have a queen we have a prince not a king?
because the bogey man (at 2 a.m.) used to come and kidnap the king the night he became a king. So they decided that in future they would have the "king" or nothing (i.e. the prince). This confused the bogey man but rumour has it he has kidnapped the singer "prince" and has since committed suicide due to prince's continued wailing (aka best selling pop song).
Q: Why is the keyboard not in alpha-order?
Because the naughty gnomes changed the order of the keys and put a spell on them so they have to remain that way for evermore.
Why do books never stay upright on a shelf and always fall over without a bookend?
di marco
02-05-2005, 19:35
cos the little book gnomes sit on the bookshelf and are annoyed that the books keep squashing them so they push them over so they can have more room!
Q: why does the sun lighten our hair but darken our skin?
Because our skin steals our hair's colour
Why do smarties have the answer?
RealityGap
03-05-2005, 10:39
because each smartie has a tiny little wise alien inside who know the awnsers to everything, the crunch you hear when you bite them is not the shell but the poor little alien........
why do parcels arrive when you nip out for 5 minutes, but never when you are in all day?
there is a thing called the "parcel devil" that dresses up as a delivery person. He waits, hiding in the bushes, until you leave the house and boom - in he goes leaves a little note saying "sorry you weren't in but a re-delivery will be attempted tomorrow when you are not in!" - try installing cctv and you will see this is perfectly true!
Q. why do laptops/PCs never boot up when you really really need them to?
RealityGap
04-05-2005, 15:05
because the "parcel devil" has a cousin called the "PC devil" (who has a smaller and more evil brother the "Laptop devil" and as soon as you need your PC or laptop the devils jump out of their hiding places (normally behind the dustbunnies below your desk/sofa) and work their evil magic to stop your machine booting up
why does ice cream melt?
$sTaCeY$
08-05-2005, 21:07
A- Ice cream melts so you can get it all over your clothes
Q- Why does nearly everyone like is this the way to amarillo
di marco
09-05-2005, 08:12
cos its the sort of song that takes over your mind so you dont know what to think properly
Q: why dont sheep shrink when it rains?
$sTaCeY$
09-05-2005, 08:30
A- because if they shrink the farmer won't kill them so quicky because they have to be big
Q- Why do people have children :)
di marco
09-05-2005, 08:34
so they can have little slaves to moan at all day!
Q: why is school a legal form of torture?
$sTaCeY$
09-05-2005, 08:56
a - they torture you so you will be good and not go to prison when your older
Q - Why do people smoke
di marco
09-05-2005, 13:48
cos they want to look and smell like a chimney (soz to anyone that i offended in saying that)
Q: what makes cuddly toys more cuddly than other toys that are just known as toys?
$sTaCeY$
09-05-2005, 14:16
because they are made of soft sponge stuff and other otys are hard bricks
Q - why do alot of people use the soapboards?
di marco
09-05-2005, 14:19
cos they are the bestest spoilerboards ever lol! and also very very very very very very addictive :D
Q: why does jelly wobble?
$sTaCeY$
09-05-2005, 14:21
because it doesn't have cement in it
Q - Why do parents get angry with kids
di marco
09-05-2005, 14:25
cos parents are mean and are not actually human but aliens who want to make everyone miserable!
Q: why are seagulls called seagulls even when they arent by the sea?
$sTaCeY$
09-05-2005, 14:26
because they flew from the sea to everywhere else
Q - why are there males and females
dragoneye454
11-05-2005, 10:50
because when you go dating there has to be a way to tell people apart so you know who to go out with so you are straight
$sTaCeY$
11-05-2005, 11:23
Q - why do soapboards exist
dragoneye454
12-05-2005, 12:58
So that people don't have to take so many baths
Q. Why are we always hungry at lunchtime
di marco
12-05-2005, 21:00
cos the evil tummy monster has eaten all our supply of food
Q: why is abbreviated such a long word?
LUSHLOOKE69
14-05-2005, 02:29
so you have to spend time abbrieviating abriveated.
Why is there such a thing as chat up lines?
dragoneye454
14-06-2005, 13:37
Because people like to appear annoying before they get to know someone
Q. Why does the sun always shine when you can't go outside
horseygal90
16-06-2005, 19:53
Because it would all be used up otherwise.
Why do birds suddenly appear?
~*~Leanne~*~
16-06-2005, 20:13
Because a man in the moon is doing magic
Q- why do fish swim
di marco
18-06-2005, 13:41
cos they aint got no legs to walk
Q: why do teachers never admit when theyre wrong?
samantha nixon
18-06-2005, 14:21
cos they are always right
why don't elephants like mice
di marco
18-06-2005, 14:22
cos theyre afriad that they will climb into their trunk
Q: why do people say its raining cats and dogs?
horseygal90
18-06-2005, 19:07
Because 'ants and frogs' doesn't have the same kind of ring to it.
Why is Choclate addictive?
di marco
18-06-2005, 21:44
cos the little choccie fairies can be rather mischevious (sp?) and like having a laugh so they put magial addictive dust into the choccie when they make it!
Q: why do parents when theyre telling you off for doing something say "if they jumped off a cliff would you do it too" when they know that of course i wouldnt?
LOL some of these are soo funny
dragoneye454
21-06-2005, 10:06
because that is the only way that they can win an argument without actually getting you to jump off a cliff.
Why is healthy food so expensive
di marco
22-06-2005, 08:07
cos they want us to eat healthy food but they want to make a huge profit in the process
Q: why, if polar bears fur is actually black, does it look white?
dragoneye454
22-06-2005, 10:16
because, they are so bad at painting ceilings that the gloss turned them white.
Q. what is the difference between being 16 and 17
2 pineapples, 7 lawnmowers and 2 kiddys swings...
Q)why are biscuits crumbly?
$sTaCeY$
22-06-2005, 20:28
buiscuits are crumbly because if they weren't you would be able to break them :)
Q - why is it hot during june
Because the sun is on holiday the rest of the time.
why did the chicken cross the road?
di marco
24-06-2005, 06:31
cos it was being chased by the mad farmer with an axe and didnt want its head chopped off
Q: why is the grass greener on the other side?
dragoneye454
13-09-2005, 13:38
Because they couldn't paint this side greener because you were standing on it.
Q> Why is english the hardest language to learn?
feelingyellow
14-09-2005, 20:57
because we've already learnt it
why is the sun yellow?
pinkles14
14-09-2005, 21:33
This is the first time i have read these and i haven't stopped laughing some of these are so funny thanks all..
because we've already learnt it
why is the sun yellow?
It was black but nasa sent astronauts to paint it yellow because they got bored of it!
Q) Why are the seas blue and rivers green?
squillyfer
14-09-2005, 22:30
because they fancied a change
Q) Why do rabbits have pink ears?
CrazyLea
14-09-2005, 22:50
because the rabbit fairy came along and tripped over a daisy and accidenly waved her wand over the ears ... turning them pink (lol dunno)
Q) Why is bread called bread
Chris_2k11
15-09-2005, 00:23
Because butter is called butter.
Q) Why do people drop litter??
.:SpIcYsPy:.
15-09-2005, 08:00
Because they are scared they might be dragged by the 'bin mouth'
Why do we have two eyes and not two mouths for eating??
feelingyellow
15-09-2005, 15:53
Because then the people who drawed out our bodies would have had to work harder.
Why are spoons called spoons?
.:SpIcYsPy:.
17-09-2005, 16:56
So they could call forks, forks!!
Why do we have a leap year every 4 years?
feelingyellow
17-09-2005, 17:19
because every 4 years 366 is a better number then 365
why our our lips pink?
they were blue but then when you got cold you wouldnt know!
Why are peoples feet different sizes?
feelingyellow
18-09-2005, 17:11
so that shoemakers can have all the fun making shoes in every different size
why are soaps called soaps?
Because someone was having a wash when they were watching the telly!
Why are there loads of different languages?
feelingyellow
19-09-2005, 17:08
so you can swear at people in different languages without them realising!
why do we have surnames?
because everone used to have the same surname but then someone thought they'd be different and name themselves after something they liked then it just caught on!
(that was a toughy, i didnt know what to say!)
Why was the alphabet invented?
feelingyellow
20-09-2005, 17:22
so we could swear!
why are strawberries red?
.:SpIcYsPy:.
20-09-2005, 18:05
Because if it was green we would think its gone 'off'
Why have we all got different coloured eyes?
$sTaCeY$
20-09-2005, 18:07
because if we all had the same eyes no one could tell who we are from
Q. Why does the earth rotate?
feelingyellow
20-09-2005, 18:10
because if it just stayed still we wouldn't feel that fab 'whirrrrrrrrrrrl'
why do we have mouths?
$sTaCeY$
20-09-2005, 18:12
cause if we didn't have mouths we couldn't eat then we would die
why is there adults?
feelingyellow
20-09-2005, 18:13
so we have someone to sponge money off
why do we have tongues?
dragoneye454
21-09-2005, 09:55
so that we can make rude gesters at people who annoy us.
Why is snow white?
because its the ash from explosions of the psat, which falls to earth during winter to remind us of all the wrongs we've done.
Why is so cold?
xxloopylauraxx
05-01-2006, 21:58
because thered be nothing to moan aboout if it was hot all year round.
Q) Did jesus have a surname?
Q) why does the pope wear a skull cap when hes catholic?
Q) why are some boggies hard and some boggies soft? (my nan sed that 2 me! hehehe)
xxloopylauraxx
05-01-2006, 21:59
so that we can make rude gesters at people who annoy us.
Why is snow white? yeah? and where does that white go when the snow melts? :confused:
Q) Did jesus have a surname?
Q) why does the pope wear a skull cap when hes catholic?
Q) why are some boggies hard and some boggies soft? (my nan sed that 2 me! hehehe)
Well i'll only answer one..... did Jesus have a surname? no, because he wasn't a sur, or a sir, but a miss. Didn't you know? :p
Why are CD's called CD's?
CrazyLea
05-01-2006, 22:22
because worms have no ears 8-)
why do dogs bark
because worms have no ears 8-)
why do dogs bark
Cause hamster are furry
Why do stars twinkle???
Chris_2k11
06-01-2006, 11:03
Cause hamster are furry
Why do stars twinkle???Because they are made of glitter.
Why do we wrap presents?
feelingyellow
06-01-2006, 23:56
So we can put on a fake surprised look.
Why is life called life?
~*~Leanne~*~
07-01-2006, 16:50
because sausages was taken
why are giraffes tall
because they are trying to eat the clouds
why are pigs pink?
~*~Leanne~*~
07-01-2006, 19:00
they eat to much candy floss
why is the world round
because god wanted a giant tennis ball to play with
why are tv's square?
~*~Leanne~*~
07-01-2006, 20:52
because people are round
why are rabbits small
beacause they like hdiing in trees
why do elephants have large ears?
~*~Leanne~*~
07-01-2006, 21:04
so mice can live in them
why does it rain like cats and dogs
because god is throwing them out of hevan
wny is rain clear?
because snow wouldn't be so cool, if rain was white, so its clear instead!
Why do humans like rock music, but dogs dont? (well thats my experience at least!)
~*~Leanne~*~
08-01-2006, 16:57
it hurts when it hits them
why do bees sting people
Cos they like causing pain.
Why does a giraffe have a long neck?
Cos they like causing pain.
Why does a giraffe have a long neck?
to match their legs
why does the sun keep on shining?
Because it saves us money on our electricity bill
Why can't dogs talk?
Because if they did they wouldn't shut up about wanting food.
Why is chocolate brown?
Because if they did they wouldn't shut up about wanting food.
Why is chocolate brown?
becuase the when mr cadbury went to Tescos they only had brown food dye
why does bacon smell so good?
dragoneye454
26-01-2006, 13:06
Because it has an addiction drug in when you smell so you love the smell.
Why do people sing off key when they have headphones on?
Because the headphones contain nanogens. They attempt to repair the vocal cords to make the person sound like the person they are listening too. Hence why they sing off key when they listen to Cheeky girls....
How does a hole punch, punch holes?
feelingyellow
26-01-2006, 18:51
it goes up into the sky and disappears and then comes back with holes, rubbish i know lol :p
what is a colour?
something found in the spectrum of light.
why can't pigs fly?
If they could fly the world would be a scary place.
Why am I itchy?
Because god thinks it's your turn to be itchy.
Why don't most french words sound the last letter?
To get revenge for us being snooty to them
Why are the soapboards so addictive?
*itchY*
Jada-GDR
29-01-2006, 19:01
the word "cocaine" is being imprinted into our minds every couple of seconds, so quickly that we dont notice but our brains register it (if you got all that)
Why is my t-shirt brown? I dont even like brown! help me out here!
nicole28
12-03-2006, 13:57
Because god wants you wear a new colour!
Why do people say dont judge a book by its cover?
Do you judge people eby the colour of their hair? no, because we can't cahnge that. So you can't diss off the cover of a book, because it can't help it if its rubbish, it just has to work with what its got.
:rotfl:
Why has my MP3 player broken?
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